Sorry all you Britney fans, I'm not talking about music, just my insatiable appetite for property.
I went to an auction yesterday and registered. First the agent says to me "Are you registering for this one as well?" Then another bidder says "Oh no, not you again!" It appears I am getting quite a reputation. Mind you I have met the other bidder at a few other auctions & each time we have been the only two bidding. We stand around for a bit talking & the Agents come over & ask us if we know the laws about collusion. All done "tongue in cheek."
So, the auctioneer starts the auction, he asks for bidders. We both stand there saying nothing, each waiting for the other to start. We, as usual, are the only two bidders. In no time the auctioneer declares the property passed in. He packs up & goes. We look at each other, say that was quick, & ask each other how come you didn't open. He says he was going to open with $130k, I say that was generous I was going to open with $100k. We laugh, talk some more & wait for everyone to leave except the listing Agent, who knows us both well.
Eventually there is just the three of us. The agent says "What's going on guys? Are you interested?" To which we both say yes at the same time. He asks us are we going to have the auction now, then looks up into the street & sees that the auctioneer has gone. He says "Do you want to make an offer?", "Yes" we both say. He scratches his head & mentions this is a strange auction. He eventually gives us both a piece of paper so we can write our offer on it. We both talk some more, trying to get a feel of what the other is writing.
After the other bidder handed in his offer, the Agent says thats a bit low, then gets mine & says thats better. He goes off to ring the vendor, hiding behind the corner of the house so we can't hear what he is saying. It did him no good as the sound carries & we both make silly comments about how the Agent should have just rung up in front of us. He comes back & tells us it is below reserve & we better make another offer. He tells us that the reserve is $210k.
We, again, take our time writing our offers. I mention I am trying to work out how much it is worth to me, the other bidder says he is trying to work out how much it's worth to me as well. The agent gets a little toey & says come on guys I saw how much writing was on your last offers, it doesn't need to take this long. Still we stall.
We give the agent our sheets of paper. He reads mine, raises an eyebrow, then reads the other bidder's. He won't tell us whose was highest just rings the vendor. He tells the vendor the highest price & then comes back & shakes my hand. My price was $195650, the other bidder was $195000. The agent is thrilled that he got a sale from us & is muttering about how he has never heard of such a bizzare auction. We are all still laughing, the other bidder shakes my hand as well, & says "You can't buy them all you know". His phone rings & he says to the caller "No, I'm still at the auction & my nemisis is here & she got me again."
We go up to the gate where there is still a couple of neighbours & the agent's assistant & she says "Well did you buy it?" we both answer yes. She doesn't know what to believe & says "What, did you go halves or something?" We both try to lead her on a bit, he says no he bought it for $147k, I say, no I bought it for $182k. Poor girl, she looks at our smiling faces & says no that can't be right. More laughing from all parties. I have to run off as I'm now late for my next appointment. I say my goodbyes & rush off.
All up this auction took an hour. All parties involved seemed to have fun. Bring on the next one.
I went to an auction yesterday and registered. First the agent says to me "Are you registering for this one as well?" Then another bidder says "Oh no, not you again!" It appears I am getting quite a reputation. Mind you I have met the other bidder at a few other auctions & each time we have been the only two bidding. We stand around for a bit talking & the Agents come over & ask us if we know the laws about collusion. All done "tongue in cheek."
So, the auctioneer starts the auction, he asks for bidders. We both stand there saying nothing, each waiting for the other to start. We, as usual, are the only two bidders. In no time the auctioneer declares the property passed in. He packs up & goes. We look at each other, say that was quick, & ask each other how come you didn't open. He says he was going to open with $130k, I say that was generous I was going to open with $100k. We laugh, talk some more & wait for everyone to leave except the listing Agent, who knows us both well.
Eventually there is just the three of us. The agent says "What's going on guys? Are you interested?" To which we both say yes at the same time. He asks us are we going to have the auction now, then looks up into the street & sees that the auctioneer has gone. He says "Do you want to make an offer?", "Yes" we both say. He scratches his head & mentions this is a strange auction. He eventually gives us both a piece of paper so we can write our offer on it. We both talk some more, trying to get a feel of what the other is writing.
After the other bidder handed in his offer, the Agent says thats a bit low, then gets mine & says thats better. He goes off to ring the vendor, hiding behind the corner of the house so we can't hear what he is saying. It did him no good as the sound carries & we both make silly comments about how the Agent should have just rung up in front of us. He comes back & tells us it is below reserve & we better make another offer. He tells us that the reserve is $210k.
We, again, take our time writing our offers. I mention I am trying to work out how much it is worth to me, the other bidder says he is trying to work out how much it's worth to me as well. The agent gets a little toey & says come on guys I saw how much writing was on your last offers, it doesn't need to take this long. Still we stall.
We give the agent our sheets of paper. He reads mine, raises an eyebrow, then reads the other bidder's. He won't tell us whose was highest just rings the vendor. He tells the vendor the highest price & then comes back & shakes my hand. My price was $195650, the other bidder was $195000. The agent is thrilled that he got a sale from us & is muttering about how he has never heard of such a bizzare auction. We are all still laughing, the other bidder shakes my hand as well, & says "You can't buy them all you know". His phone rings & he says to the caller "No, I'm still at the auction & my nemisis is here & she got me again."
We go up to the gate where there is still a couple of neighbours & the agent's assistant & she says "Well did you buy it?" we both answer yes. She doesn't know what to believe & says "What, did you go halves or something?" We both try to lead her on a bit, he says no he bought it for $147k, I say, no I bought it for $182k. Poor girl, she looks at our smiling faces & says no that can't be right. More laughing from all parties. I have to run off as I'm now late for my next appointment. I say my goodbyes & rush off.
All up this auction took an hour. All parties involved seemed to have fun. Bring on the next one.
