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A Jehova's Witness came to my dor last night, and I said come'on in, what do you want to talk about? He said, "I've got no freakin' idea. I've never made it this far before!"

Of course, even your real mates find it confusing, which is hardest of all, so with them I always respond as to how the incipient property empire is developing, "the banks thoroughly own my @ss now!" Emphasise the debt and duty, and they feel wise for having taken the easier road. Far better...

Years ago I used to discuss investing at work when co-workers asked about it, but then realised it was only confirming their suspicions that there was something wrong with me. I just wasn't spending all my income with them every night at the pub! Now, in a different a job where I'm the...