Eloping

My husband and I eloped 25 years ago and married in Jersey (Channel Islands) in the registry office there. It was a quaint beautifully decorated stone building and the equally ancient law clerks were out witnesses. I had always thougha registry wedding cheap and sterile, but the surroundings made this special and intimate (beautiful flower arrangements on display which would have cost a fortune). We then had lunch at the local french restaurant, a walk on the beach, and caught the ferry to Sark for the night.
Never regretted it and would do it again (although maybe with a change of spouse)
 
cegosling said:
Never regretted it and would do it again (although maybe with a change of spouse)
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Does that mean you are no longer together? Though you didn't say ex-husband? If you are together, I hope he isn't reading this :D.

The only registry wedding I have attended was about four years ago in Brisbane. I was expecting a sterile, boring government office but it was quite a nice setting, with nice chairs and flowers, nothing like I had envisioned. I was pleasantly surprised.
 
wylie said:
This is what we would have done. I didn't mean (in my earlier post) to suggest our parents would not have been invited.
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My response wasn't to anyone in particular - infact had to go and reread what you wrote :).

I like you had the big wedding (probably small compared to most weddings where parents are European) to please everyone else, although I did have a great time in the end and husband described it as the best day of his life.

Personally if the person your child commits to is a great person, I wouldn't really care if they got married or not, eloped or otherwise - BUT I think it would be nice to at least be considered as people important enough to be part of that very small party, on a day they consider very significant.
 
We didn't elope, but had a smallish wedding (60 people).

It was definitely one of the best days of my life, but leading up to it was hell and we were considering eloping instead.

We would've upset a lot of people if we did elope, but it's your day so do whatever you want. Don't worry about upsetting anyone, because no matter how much you try to please everyone there will always be one (or in our case, a number) of people upset and unhappy.

Your true friends and your family will get over it, and be happy for you.
 
My cousin did it while on an overseas holiday with girlfriend. At first everyone is a bit shocked but quickly gets over it while being happy at the same time.
 
streetie said:
Has anyone on here eloped?

It's getting about time I put a ring on my mrs finger soon. I suggested to her once that when we get married it should be just me and her on a beach somewhere and she told me she loved that idea and would like that too.

It would also make things a lot easier and cheaper on us as she is from Sweden, so trying to organise family to get across the otherside of the world would be a nightmare.

So has anyone done it and recommend it?
Also as a parents perspective would you be dissapointed in your child if they came home and said they were married without them being invited?
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Do you know if it is important for her parents to see their daughter in wedding dress and 'give her away'?

I am not eloping, but will have a small wedding this January with 10 people and a good family lunch. I would've elope and straight to honeymoon if wedding is not important for my parents (they're flying to Sydney from home and with lots of convincing to reduce size to 10 instead on 100).
 
I'm actually looking into this at the moment. This is what I was thinking .
Fly to Las Vegas for a week, hire a Ferrari for $500 for 4 hours and do a drive thru Elvis wedding. ( then blow what the cost of a big wedding on the casino floor probably)

http://www.aspecialmemory.com/weddings/elvis-weddings-and-renewals/

package.http://www.vegasluxuryrides.com/rentalVehicles.php

It a win win for everyone! She gets a wedding, we have holiday, I get to drive a Ferrari and we could even get rich!

Kitschy and corny I know but it would be fun. Either that or some little ceremony on a beach in Fiji.
We couldn't be bothered with all the pomp and B,S of a traditional ceremony. After all it is a pagan ritual. Did I mention I get to drive a Ferrari ?
 
If I were to elope the parents and siblings would have to be invited. Even though getting married is between the two people involved, it has a LOT of meaning for the members of your family also. I couldn't hold that from them.

But then, it's only 7 weeks to the fiance and I have our big (boo hiss) wedding day. :)
 
Lil Skater said:
We would've upset a lot of people if we did elope, but it's your day so do whatever you want.
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Everyone gets over it, and I agree it's what you want in the end, but people that think others shouldn't be considered from what to them is also a significant event/life event shouldn't think the families need to consider them in return either when it comes to major things, ie. babysitting children at short notice "it's my retirement so sod off", dropping their hours to help when you're sick or in desperate need of help, etc.

I suppose it all boils down to the relationship you have with your family - I know I wouldn't consider inviting the "sod off" "it's just about me" type parents.

My husbands and my family have always been the type to give up the world for us, so in return we are more than happy to consider them. Infact we consider them before us at our expense sometimes because they do the same.

It has nothing to do with duty and all to do with caring involved families.
 
I don't think others shouldn't be considered, not at all, I more meant don't just do what everyone else wants to keep them happy.

In the end I'm glad I shared the day with my family and friends, but I didn't appreciate how some made the day about them and what they wanted.

It really comes down to the relationship Streetie has with his family to make an informed decision on what they want on their day.
 
A person should never do anything that they think is wrong for them or that they horribly oppose.

At the same time everything one does leaves an impression/effect on others.

In the case of families, how we conduct ourselves, and I mean in regards to all family matters now, influences how others think of us and treat us back - that includes how our children view us though our relationships with others too.
 
I think most people are happy for the couple...but generally hate going to weddings.

That has always been my impression when listening to people.
 
kathryn d said:
I think most people are happy for the couple...but generally hate going to weddings.

That has always been my impression when listening to people.
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I've always disliked big weddings where I don't know anyone and have to be seated near strangers. Fortunately this hasn't happened too often.

We once got invited to a wedding where I didn't know either of the people. Infact rang my husband to inquire who Rocco and Pina (or close to) were and he had no idea.

It took him some time before the penny dropped and realized it was an employee of one of the suppliers he deals with :eek:.

550 people, about 7 courses, and boring as hell.

Come to think of it, I'm not sure why we even bothered to attend :confused:.
 
kathryn d said:
I think most people are happy for the couple...but generally hate going to weddings.

That has always been my impression when listening to people.
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We had a really fun wedding/reception. Most of the guests said it was the best wedding they'd been too. It was my dream wedding. The guests asked if the DJ would play for an extra hour and he was enjoying it too so he offered to do it for free so we just left when we were ready and left them to it. I wouldn't change a thing. It's your day, do it how you want to. I was like this most of the day :D and my jaw muscles ached for a couple of days afterward.
 
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