I must first acknowledge that the broad concept of “Friend or Foe” as I elaborate upon below is that of a personal development author named Johnny Wimbrey. I have summarised and reworded some of his ideas and incorporate some of my notes taken when I saw him live two years ago and annotated with my own thoughts and reflections to post something that I believe is very important in our journey to win. It has helped me don a different perspective in numerous situations and thought I’d share with my Somersoft friends. 
In a quest to BE DO HAVE (Be more Do more Have more), in whatever realm of achievement, most of us would probably agree that no one is an island. As we rely on teams of professionals, colleagues, mentors, role models and other trusted people in our investing lives, it is important to ascertain whether or not these people are pushing us toward our destiny or holding us back. In other words are they a friend or are they a foe?
In the context of success and winning, a friend or foe is much more than just a person. A friend can be any person, place or thing that’s helping us become everything that God (Grand Organised Design, universe, creator, choose your own metaphor) intended us to be. A foe is someone or something that holding us back and stopping us from getting there.
A friend (person, place or thing) is pushing us toward our destiny and helping to build us into a better person. These include people that celebrate us and not merely tolerate us. I find that if we need to explain, validate or down play our success to others to not offend, intimidate or upset their status quo of mediocrity, we are likely to be dealing with a foe. They may not be intentional enemies or knowingly wish to harm us, however as they are not helping push us toward our destiny (goals and dreams), then by default they are holding us back and indeed sucking us down and dragging us to their level. In an attempt to not lose us from the tribe, they may thwart our progress to prosper and achieve.
Never apologise for your success or if you are beginning on the success path, never apologise for wanting to better yourself to anyone or you will compromise your success and self worth. These are the people who are not allowing you to be who you want to be (you have to put on an act to not intimidate them and their chosen comfy couch lifestyle). They are foes who will hold you back from your true destiny.
These may include our peers, work colleagues, relatives and immediate family. No doubt we all have stories and experiences of our own with the latter I heard a good phrase once encapsulates this.....”Love your family; Choose your peers.” We are responsible for who we spend major time with. This leads to the biggest foe of all, OURSELVES What we consume and what consumes us will help shape our destiny; good or bad. The true enemy sometimes is inside of us (ourselves). We have a choice to entertain the things (foes) that may be holding us back, so at the end of the day, we are the enemy for allowing the foes (people, places or things) to persist in our lives/reality and therefore hold us back.
We are free to choose. We can be a pilot or a passenger. We have to be vigilant about what we consume or what consumes us. When we identify (by personal inventory) what’s inside us and what we participate in that might be holding us back, we need to take action to let them go and stop being the enemy inside ourselves. Otherwise we become the very thing that holds us back the most.
Some questions to reflect include, where are we going; who do we listen to; what are we watching on TV or reading; who do we spend the most time with and whether we have healthy social habits?, etc.
If, once we identify the things that hold us back, we delay cutting loose the foes from our lives, then we remain our own worst enemy. Whilst in life we (should) enjoy moderation in most things, this should not apply to foes. There’s no such thing as moderation in entertaining foes, i.e: just one or two or only occasionally.......we end up getting sucked back into a spiral of negativity and becoming our own enemy. Association brings about assimilation. It is important to do the things that are building us up and not tearing nus down.
Aristotle said....”I count him braver who overcomes his desires that he who overcomes his enemies, for the hardest (most satisfying and important; emphasis mine) victory is over self.
We don’t have the luxury to entertain foes once we have identified them, We should not feel guilty for wanting to better ourselves or compromise our success at the cost of a foe. True friends will not be intimidated by our desire for success and desire to win.
I’ve found the following questions useful to reflect on my path at times and these are not just limited to monetary success; they may include relationships, health, career, or whatever else we desire or need to heal. You may find it useful to answer these for yourselves:
Are the places you are going to the most building you into a better person?
What (and who) do you listen to (or watch) and is that building you into a better person?
Who do you socialise with and are they building you into a better person?
Could your enemies or foes very well be the things that you are entertaining most?
Some confronting questions for self inventory. Personally I am guilty of sometimes procrastinating and delaying decisions because it’s safer on the comfy couch. We are a long time dead and life is too short to be tiptoeing through life to arrive as safe as possible at our grave.
Initially we may not know what we don’t know, however once we do have the knowledge there is no excuse for failing to take action. Wisdom is the application of knowledge.....those who have knowledge and fail to apply it are fools at the very least, and remain their very own enemy by continuing to entertain their foes (people, places, thing, behaviours, etc).
“Destiny is not a matter of chance, it is a matter of choice; it is not a thing to be waited for, it is a thing to be achieved” – William J. Bryan.
Perhaps Jim Rohn summarises this thread best, ..................Don’t Major In Minor Things.
Are you your own best friend or are you your foe?
In a quest to BE DO HAVE (Be more Do more Have more), in whatever realm of achievement, most of us would probably agree that no one is an island. As we rely on teams of professionals, colleagues, mentors, role models and other trusted people in our investing lives, it is important to ascertain whether or not these people are pushing us toward our destiny or holding us back. In other words are they a friend or are they a foe?
In the context of success and winning, a friend or foe is much more than just a person. A friend can be any person, place or thing that’s helping us become everything that God (Grand Organised Design, universe, creator, choose your own metaphor) intended us to be. A foe is someone or something that holding us back and stopping us from getting there.
A friend (person, place or thing) is pushing us toward our destiny and helping to build us into a better person. These include people that celebrate us and not merely tolerate us. I find that if we need to explain, validate or down play our success to others to not offend, intimidate or upset their status quo of mediocrity, we are likely to be dealing with a foe. They may not be intentional enemies or knowingly wish to harm us, however as they are not helping push us toward our destiny (goals and dreams), then by default they are holding us back and indeed sucking us down and dragging us to their level. In an attempt to not lose us from the tribe, they may thwart our progress to prosper and achieve.
Never apologise for your success or if you are beginning on the success path, never apologise for wanting to better yourself to anyone or you will compromise your success and self worth. These are the people who are not allowing you to be who you want to be (you have to put on an act to not intimidate them and their chosen comfy couch lifestyle). They are foes who will hold you back from your true destiny.
These may include our peers, work colleagues, relatives and immediate family. No doubt we all have stories and experiences of our own with the latter
I heard a good phrase once encapsulates this.....”Love your family; Choose your peers.” We are responsible for who we spend major time with. This leads to the biggest foe of all, OURSELVES What we consume and what consumes us will help shape our destiny; good or bad. The true enemy sometimes is inside of us (ourselves). We have a choice to entertain the things (foes) that may be holding us back, so at the end of the day, we are the enemy for allowing the foes (people, places or things) to persist in our lives/reality and therefore hold us back.We are free to choose. We can be a pilot or a passenger. We have to be vigilant about what we consume or what consumes us. When we identify (by personal inventory) what’s inside us and what we participate in that might be holding us back, we need to take action to let them go and stop being the enemy inside ourselves. Otherwise we become the very thing that holds us back the most.
Some questions to reflect include, where are we going; who do we listen to; what are we watching on TV or reading; who do we spend the most time with and whether we have healthy social habits?, etc.
If, once we identify the things that hold us back, we delay cutting loose the foes from our lives, then we remain our own worst enemy.
Whilst in life we (should) enjoy moderation in most things, this should not apply to foes. There’s no such thing as moderation in entertaining foes, i.e: just one or two or only occasionally.......we end up getting sucked back into a spiral of negativity and becoming our own enemy. Association brings about assimilation. It is important to do the things that are building us up and not tearing nus down.Aristotle said....”I count him braver who overcomes his desires that he who overcomes his enemies, for the hardest (most satisfying and important; emphasis mine) victory is over self.
We don’t have the luxury to entertain foes once we have identified them, We should not feel guilty for wanting to better ourselves or compromise our success at the cost of a foe. True friends will not be intimidated by our desire for success and desire to win.
I’ve found the following questions useful to reflect on my path at times and these are not just limited to monetary success; they may include relationships, health, career, or whatever else we desire or need to heal. You may find it useful to answer these for yourselves:
Are the places you are going to the most building you into a better person?
What (and who) do you listen to (or watch) and is that building you into a better person?
Who do you socialise with and are they building you into a better person?
Could your enemies or foes very well be the things that you are entertaining most?
Some confronting questions for self inventory. Personally I am guilty of sometimes procrastinating and delaying decisions because it’s safer on the comfy couch. We are a long time dead and life is too short to be tiptoeing through life to arrive as safe as possible at our grave.
Initially we may not know what we don’t know, however once we do have the knowledge there is no excuse for failing to take action. Wisdom is the application of knowledge.....those who have knowledge and fail to apply it are fools at the very least, and remain their very own enemy by continuing to entertain their foes (people, places, thing, behaviours, etc).
“Destiny is not a matter of chance, it is a matter of choice; it is not a thing to be waited for, it is a thing to be achieved” – William J. Bryan.
Perhaps Jim Rohn summarises this thread best, ..................Don’t Major In Minor Things.
Are you your own best friend or are you your foe?
