Grandparents Looking After Grandchildren

From another thread

redwing said:
What I've also noticed a lot of lately is the amount of Grandparents looking after Grandchildren from 1-2 day's a week, just dropping Grandchildren off and picking up from School, or looking after them for up to 5 days a week, whilst the parents work

I also know a couple of people who's Grandparents pay the Grandchildren's School Fees (like the below).

Should grandparents help out with the cost of school fees?

Dinner on Saturday night saw a group of parents discussing whether their children are going to public or private school. While it wasn't a debate over which school system is better, the conversation was about cost. One friend put the onus onto her own parents, saying that her children would only be attending the local private school if the grandparents were forking out for the fees.

It got me thinking. Is the reliance on our parents to support us and our children more common than we think? How much do we take it for granted?

Grandparents saving families millions on child care

Grandparents are saving parents almost $90 million a year on child care in New South Wales, according to a report released today by the Council on the Ageing.

The report found between 10 and 20 per cent of people aged over 65 are providing unpaid care for their grandchildren.

Here's what you had to say about this story.
The council's Ian Day says grandparents are typically providing about 12 hours of care each week.

"The average time per week is about 12.7 hours and therefore they're probably saving their children in the order of $1.8 million a week or almost $90 million a year in childcare costs," he said.

But he says the trend is not across all socio-economic groups.

"The incidence of grandparents looking after their grandchildren seems to be isolated to some of the wealthier suburbs," he said.

"So you could almost guess that the grandparents are helping their own children to stay in the general area by looking after the grandchildren while their children go back to work to pay the mortgage."

A trend, or the norm?

My kids are lucky to see one set of Grandparents a year and the other set, whilst close by don't babysit or look after the kids in situations other than one off's or emergencies
 
My sister and her husband recently moved from Sydney back "home" to Perth so my retired mother/father and her husbands retired mother could help them care for their first child, now with a second on the way.

Twice a week they mind my niece while my sister catches up with a friend/does some shopping/whatever.

Everyone wins. Sister gets some free time, grandparents get time with the grandchild and I don't ever have babysitting duties.

They can easily afford any kind of child care, have private schooling organised, but it is more of a time with family rather than a logistics/financial decision.
 
Nanna looks after ours 2 days a week 2/3 weeks. Her choice. She is not looking forward to next year because they will all be at school and she is worried she won't see them anymore. On the other side grandpa isn't interested. He does the obligatory birthday and Xmas drop off present token gesture.
 
I think it's really common, when families live close. I also don't think it's a bad thing, as long as there's balance "it takes a village" and all that. As a single parent I depend quite a lot on my parents to help out. J is in his last year of daycare and for the 8 months it took me to actually find the amount of care I needed Mum (& Dad a bit) looked after him 1 day per week. The closeness they developed in that time has carried through till now & is lovely to see. These days they do fill ins, during holidays, if he's sick, if I have to go away for work etc. My brother lives 10 mins away and about once every 2 months does a drop off or pick up, again if I need to have a long work day - i do a few inter-city / inter-state trips each year which would not be possible without the support of family. Financial support is another matter & I think it's not my position to judge. M&D are putting $ away for J for when he's older - uni / car / first house fund. I wouldn't dream of asking them for financial support. Though the care they provide saves me a load of money it's more about what's best for him.

And can I just say I'm very much looking forward to not be paying $15K a year in childcare costs!! (after govt assistance)
 
I don't think this is a new trend. I think it is something that has always been the case when the Grandparents live locally.
 
From another thread



I also know a couple of people who's Grandparents pay the Grandchildren's School Fees (like the below).

Should grandparents help out with the cost of school fees?



Grandparents saving families millions on child care



A trend, or the norm?

My kids are lucky to see one set of Grandparents a year and the other set, whilst close by don't babysit or look after the kids in situations other than one off's or emergencies

I've always wondered about why some people have such absentee grandparents. Such a shame, my life would be a lot less enriched without my grandparents.
 
No, absolutely not. If you feel that your child is better than everyone else, you pay for it if you feel the need to send them to private schools.

On a side note, public schools actually outperform private schools on HSC results.

My parents look after my niece and nephew most days and everyone enjoys it. I don't see anything wrong with that.

Pretty much every study has concluded that the biggest predictor of academic success is parents who were educated themselves and are engaged with and encourage their childrens studies. This plays a bigger role than going to a private school, etc.
 
I see it a lot bring a teacher.
Quite a few grandparents bringing kids to scoop and doing reading groups etc. I think it's great for kids to have a close relationship with their grandparents.
What I don't understand are the parents who have no relationship with their child as they leave it all to their own parents. This is not common but I have seen it. Grandparents who drop kids off, pick them up, take them to sport, fix their dinner, while the parent does no parenting. I have had kids whose psrents I have never met. They can't even be bothered to take an jhour off once a year for the interview. Very sad indeed.

Lately I've come across a few grandparents that actually have custody or young grandchildren due to irresponsible parents. That's so hard. One lady is in her 70's and has to care for 2 young grandchildren. The support for these grandparents is not good enough.

Rant over!

On a personal note, I'm more than happy to babysit. I'd give a day a week if needed, as I still work 3 days. I believe the parents of the child should supply everything for the child, both emotionally and monetary. Grandparenting is supposed to be all about the joys of parenting without the responsibility. Although what grandparent doesn't esnt yo buy things for their grsnchildren! It's should be about choice, not obligation.
Had to laugh. Was just checking spelling as the iPad tends to change things. Grsndparenting was changed to Grandpa renting. Haha. Ironic? ;)
 
I moved closer to home once my first child was born to have the "village" help out. When I worked full time my mum looked after my daughter 2 days per week and I took her to daycare on the other days. They have a really strong bond now.

I would never ask my parents to cover school fees although I have a relative whose parents insisted they pay for private education for the grand kids.
 
Lately I've come across a few grandparents that actually have custody or young grandchildren due to irresponsible parents. That's so hard. One lady is in her 70's and has to care for 2 young grandchildren. The support for these grandparents is not good enough.

Agree 100%. I've known of a few grandparents that have raised their grandkids. If they hadn't have stepped up to the plate to take in these children they would have entered foster care. As a foster carer, you get a payment to do this, as a grandparent, you do not, other than the usual parenting payment.
 
I'm looking forward to looking after my future grand kids and helping my kids out. I wouldn't consider paying for private schooling.
I think kids really benefit from having a relationship and spending time regularly with their grandparents. Ideally I would have wanted that for my kids. As I moved interstate their isn't a huge bond between my parents and kids which is a bit sad. They are still a bit shy around them. Hard when you are so far away and only see them every few years.
Before I moved interstate, while pregnant, my mother in law promised she'd look after my kids while I worked for two or three days/wk but she did it for one day then said it was too hard. Then the offer got reduced to one child for one hour a week which got too difficult once I had two kids. So my kids only know the other grand parents a little bit also.
My parents look after my sisters kids on school holidays when my sister works part-time and occasionally when my sister and hubby have time out together. My parents find it tiring but they love it and have a nice bond.
 
typical entitlement attitude by the current generation, and it disgusts me,

having kids that you chose to have is now expected to be looked after by the government for financial support, your employer for paternity leave, and grandparents who worked hard to raise you most likely alone now are expected to fork out financially and time wise,

this country is an embarassment, no wonder every assylum seeker and mail order bride wants to come here for an easy ride
 
typical entitlement attitude by the current generation, and it disgusts me,

having kids that you chose to have is now expected to be looked after by the government for financial support, your employer for paternity leave, and grandparents who worked hard to raise you most likely alone now are expected to fork out financially and time wise,

this country is an embarassment, no wonder every assylum seeker and mail order bride wants to come here for an easy ride

if you want house prices to go up, you should be all for grandparents looking after the Grand Children. More income + less money spent on childcare = Bigger mortgages.....
 
My sister and her husband recently moved from Sydney back "home" to Perth so my retired mother/father and her husbands retired mother could help them care for their first child, now with a second on the way.

Twice a week they mind my niece while my sister catches up with a friend/does some shopping/whatever.

Everyone wins. Sister gets some free time, grandparents get time with the grandchild and I don't ever have babysitting duties.

They can easily afford any kind of child care, have private schooling organised, but it is more of a time with family rather than a logistics/financial decision.

Yep, the way it should be. My folks pick up our little one (2.5 y.o.) from day care 2 days a week, take her home, play with her, bath her and feed her dinner. My wifes mother does the same one day a week. Its probably 3 hours at a time. My folks also line up to take her anytime on the weekend (not very often needed though), and for a sleepover every few weeks. They love her to bits and she has a great relationship with them. This is what family is about surely?

As for expecting the grandparents to pay for schooling, yeah, well that's pretty disgraceful.
 
The last generation of young grandparents

As couples have children later in life, the situation of grandparents providing babysitting services will be less and less as the grandparents will be too old.

We are an example of having kids late in life and my husbands parents were in their late 70's and my parents were both deceased by the time we had children.

I think this current generation of child bearing age will be the lucky ones as they will have the benefit of the energy of young grandparents, not so for subsequent generations.

Just a thought.
 
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