Hi Marg
Whether we choose to acknowledge it or not, the desire for validation is one of the strongest motivating forces known to man/woman.
It’s actually pretty basic....makes us feel secure.
MTR
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How to deal with -ve people
- Thread starter spanna
- Start date
Hi Marg
Whether we choose to acknowledge it or not, the desire for validation is one of the strongest motivating forces known to man/woman.
It’s actually pretty basic....makes us feel secure.
MTR
.
I just smile and walk away.
Life's too short to waste selling an idea.
Life's too short to waste selling an idea.
Eh, it's their problem. We also don't talk about it with people we know, unless they specifically ask about it. No point in boring everybody with the mundane details of our lives, and the reality is, most of it is mundane. And I don't want to talk about things like cleaning the loos when tenants vacate... it's depressing enough to have to do it!
The power of other peoples opinions decreases as you grow wiser though life's trials, tribulations and victories.
Its all part of the life journey. The older I get the less I say and the more I listen.
Those that don't appear to cheer you on are often under a weight of insecurity and self doubt that they may not be consciously aware of. Or they could be genuinely concerned albeit out of ignorance.
Its all part of the life journey. The older I get the less I say and the more I listen.
Those that don't appear to cheer you on are often under a weight of insecurity and self doubt that they may not be consciously aware of. Or they could be genuinely concerned albeit out of ignorance.
What he said.
I've tried several times to help out folks whose financial situation is extremely "upside down".
Not that I'm any expert, but I do have a few clues about what is a good spend of money and what isn't.
I'm done with helping folk who don't ask for help, and I keep what I've done/do to myself until they ask about what they should do.
Usually; they don't ask.
It's an interesting observation that the folks who are least likely to ask are the ones who are the most "upside down" and are also the biggest critics of rich folks.
Agree with earlier post. Why do other people's opinions matter so much if you don't think they're correct? If you know you're onto something good, that's enough. Obviously too much self-doubt if you need people's approval in investment strategies.
Also don't hang around with local govt Councillors - biggest party poopers ever 
Or change topic. Or if you can't, just say "Yes, ok ok. Yes ok ok. You're right, ok ok. Need to go. Ok ok bye"
Sometimes you want to share good experience or what you plan to do next year (since they ask). I learn not to say anything to those who can't handle it.
Also don't hang around with local govt Councillors - biggest party poopers ever
What happened lol?
Dont tell them, tell us here.
All of the above is right, you cannot change them. They want you to fear and then fail, as if you don't and succeed..... it shows them to be the failure, they secretly fear they are.
I have had a few ask re IP when I use to tell people I had some. I don't tell any more.
But of those I helped say 5 , 4 did nothing on my advice, no 5 did..... he read SS, researched and set a strategy. No 5 just bought IP no 15! yes that is fifteen. Yet his partner has another 2 and complains about them.
Peter
All of the above is right, you cannot change them. They want you to fear and then fail, as if you don't and succeed..... it shows them to be the failure, they secretly fear they are.
I have had a few ask re IP when I use to tell people I had some. I don't tell any more.
But of those I helped say 5 , 4 did nothing on my advice, no 5 did..... he read SS, researched and set a strategy. No 5 just bought IP no 15! yes that is fifteen. Yet his partner has another 2 and complains about them.
Peter
Mix more with Chinese and Jewish people.
Both groups seem to applaud wealth creation, and are genuinely interested in how its achieved
Both groups seem to applaud wealth creation, and are genuinely interested in how its achieved
It's like anybody who has a belief where they've "seen the light"- which may be with religion, giving up smoking or drinking, met a woman. They will try to convert you to their way of thinking. The chances are you probably won't be the least bit interested.
But this time you're the zealous convert.
But this time you're the zealous convert.
Quite right, property speculators often fail spectacularly due to excessive leverage, a lot on this forum just don't see that possibility and seem to think it's a guaranteed path to riches.
Amen to that !! It's both lonely and quiet.
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“Humans will forever seek validation” -This link covers what I am trying to articulate
http://ragsnair.com/2013/03/28/validation/
?Humans will forever seek validation? -This link covers what I am trying to articulate
http://ragsnair.com/2013/03/28/validation/
I think it is also, we want someone to check our work, this is risky stuff!!!
Personally, I have a good mate, we are both in to property. BOth blunt and honest. and both our partners dont give a hoot,
We get to compain about that and then argue for and against each others proposals/buys. A second opinion from someone with no agenda to beat.
I am lucky as he is very good at IP and very rare to be impartial but also a mate that can be personal and understand that factor as well.
SS is good for opinions and I value many here.
Peter
The thing is, talking to people at length (or repeatedly) about things that don't interest them doesn't always result in the validation you describe.
It's a bit like beating someone with a stick until they like you.
Either these people don't read others well or they believe in the stick philosophy.
It's a bit like beating someone with a stick until they like you
.Either these people don't read others well or they believe in the stick philosophy
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