laws regarding furniture that a tenant or ex left to pick up later
- Thread starter jasonp3
- Start date
Jason, is it possible your involvement is making the situation worse?
These people are adults and should be left to work much of this out for themselves.
While they're still together (providing they are not at risk of murder or any other crime) you should probably keep right out of it.
These people are adults and should be left to work much of this out for themselves.
While they're still together (providing they are not at risk of murder or any other crime) you should probably keep right out of it.
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So in summary and with only one side of the story (his)..
Have I missed anything?
It's looking a lot like a relationship, next time tell him to go down to the knock shop, they may love him more and cost him less
- Good Friends that evolved into friends with benefits
- She became pregnant
- He told her to move in and he would assist her
- She moved in and brought furniture with her
- He didn't charge her rent?
- She put him as a partner with Centrelink
- He signed Paperwork confirming he was a partner with Centrelink
- He let her use his car, paid for fuel etc
- She is working, but wants to start her own business?
- The friendships now gone South, he's found out she has a $35k debt also and wants her (and her furniture) out
- She's still living there or has moved out?
- He's prepared to pay Child Support
Have I missed anything?
It's looking a lot like a relationship, next time tell him to go down to the knock shop, they may love him more and cost him less
....yep, that was the only mistake, but you covered that already in step 1.
Screwed twice and only the first time was pleasurable?
he discovered this morning that she has made a huge scratch in his car.
she has a history of being vindictive with ex boyfriends.
she did something to the last ones property and when confronted by police her family lied and made a false aliby saying she wasnt in that town
well shes done that again he found a huge scratch on his car this morning.
redwing
she is NOT WORKING
THATS THE PROBLEM.
if she could at least cover her debt thats one less major issue.
he cant support her and her huge debt.
He tried to do the right thing time and again for her,
a social worker also tried to protect him from all types of coersion/ manipulation from her and tried to see how to get her to move out but she wouldnt leave time and again.
People around him are simply listening. Its quite normal for anyone in crisis to turn to friends, relatives, professionals, whoever they can talk to and trust will help, advise, support,wisely, without making anything worse. Its obvious to him and anyone else, social worker friends that he cant support her and her irresponsible debts.
Its been months of efforts of trying to end this and have her move out calmly and finalise this calmly once it was clear she wont budget, or contribute, or solve anything.
she has a history of being vindictive with ex boyfriends.
she did something to the last ones property and when confronted by police her family lied and made a false aliby saying she wasnt in that town
well shes done that again he found a huge scratch on his car this morning.
redwing
she is NOT WORKING
THATS THE PROBLEM.
if she could at least cover her debt thats one less major issue.
he cant support her and her huge debt.
He tried to do the right thing time and again for her,
a social worker also tried to protect him from all types of coersion/ manipulation from her and tried to see how to get her to move out but she wouldnt leave time and again.
People around him are simply listening. Its quite normal for anyone in crisis to turn to friends, relatives, professionals, whoever they can talk to and trust will help, advise, support,wisely, without making anything worse. Its obvious to him and anyone else, social worker friends that he cant support her and her irresponsible debts.
Its been months of efforts of trying to end this and have her move out calmly and finalise this calmly once it was clear she wont budget, or contribute, or solve anything.
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Financially she will most probably be better off moving out - getting sole parents pension (or whatever they call it these days!) + rental assistance + maintenance from your friend.
Of course none of this will come into play until she gives birth. Until then she needs to get off her ar$e and work like everyone else has to.
She's 35 - she's a big girl now and can sort it out her own debts. If she and your friend choose to live together then he doesn't have to take on her debt. If she gets behind in paying that debt then that is her problem and she can declare bankruptcy etc.
His first duty is to the child-to-be. He will need to financially support that child and most importantly have a role in the custody and emotional wellbeing of that child.
Of course none of this will come into play until she gives birth. Until then she needs to get off her ar$e and work like everyone else has to.
She's 35 - she's a big girl now and can sort it out her own debts. If she and your friend choose to live together then he doesn't have to take on her debt. If she gets behind in paying that debt then that is her problem and she can declare bankruptcy etc.
His first duty is to the child-to-be. He will need to financially support that child and most importantly have a role in the custody and emotional wellbeing of that child.
I have been in a very similar situation (except I was the pregnant one).
Twenty years later, and with hindsight, everything has worked out fine, but it was extremely hard, particularly the first year - perhaps she is just upset and confused - like your friend.
Not everyone is seeking to take advantage of other people.
Things have a way of working themselves out. My suggestion is to butt out and let them work out what is best for them.
Twenty years later, and with hindsight, everything has worked out fine, but it was extremely hard, particularly the first year - perhaps she is just upset and confused - like your friend.
Not everyone is seeking to take advantage of other people.
Things have a way of working themselves out. My suggestion is to butt out and let them work out what is best for them.
your friend has obviously not learnt his lesson yet if its happened more then once before
sounds like he is already one or about to...sorry to say
did he look in the mirror?
let me guess, the 6 months mark is about to come or has already passed? which would involve defacto laws being applied, how many other defacto relationships has she been in or in at the moment
with what? unless she gets some grant or gets one of her suckers to give her a loan or buy her a business, that aint going to happen in a million years, or more like 7 years. Let me guess she wants to open a hair salon?
mate, you keep on going on about how your freind is a nice guy, generous, blah blah, and thats great, however, thats not going to help him, he needs to toughen up and look after himself, or else when he is 60 years old, he is going to be bitter, broke, and the single father of a bout 9 kids
he needs to harden up and make some tough decisions, to look after himself and his kid, if it is really his (id suggest a dna test immediately)
Most of the people on here from what I can see are fairly sensible and financially savvy and have financial intelligence, and probably are unlikely to be in your friend/womans situation in the first place, so maybe cannot relate to your situation
good luck
edit: is this $35k debt from credit cards? car loans?
if she isnt working Im not sure how anyone could afford $1000 per month on repayments alone even with benefits, and with no rent
edit again: Ill bet you my kidney that its not your friend but YOU
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Jason, you seem very emotionally vested in your 'friend'. Is this really your friends problem, or your own?
There has certainly been some irresponsibility here, but I would suggest that having sex with the lack of any form of birth control with someone you are not in a committed relationship is the most irresponsible part of this whole issue. I mean, the young lady involved didn't just slip and fall onto a penis, did she?
So.....no more talk of debt and irresponsibility here. He (or you) have only yourself to blame. First thing remove the woman from the home. Get a paternity test. Then pay your way until the child is eighteen if its determined that you're the father. Oh, and don't be a deadbeat here either. Go for joint custody and share in the upbringing too.
There has certainly been some irresponsibility here, but I would suggest that having sex with the lack of any form of birth control with someone you are not in a committed relationship is the most irresponsible part of this whole issue. I mean, the young lady involved didn't just slip and fall onto a penis, did she?
So.....no more talk of debt and irresponsibility here. He (or you) have only yourself to blame. First thing remove the woman from the home. Get a paternity test. Then pay your way until the child is eighteen if its determined that you're the father. Oh, and don't be a deadbeat here either. Go for joint custody and share in the upbringing too.
Especially because of this thread
http://somersoft.com/forums/showthread.php?t=83606
http://somersoft.com/forums/showthread.php?t=83606
ah - good spotting.
Jason - it's your babe but not your debt. Whether you are defacto or not you don't need to pay her debt. Encourage her to seek the advice of one of the free debt counsellors out there and let her work out a plan.
Do be a man though and sort out your relationship with her so that you can be a good Dad to the kid - so maintain communication lines (with her), be there emotionally, and make a good effort with custody.
back to the original question. she is not a tenant but a spouse, so i am not sure if this will apply but here is a link to the abandoned goods legilsation for nsw
http://www.austlii.edu.au/au/legis/nsw/consol_act/uga1995179/
http://www.austlii.edu.au/au/legis/nsw/consol_act/uga1995179/
