AlexP... can you all sit around as a family and explain to your brother that whilst your parents were happy to help him out of a pickle, that was 15 years ago and they really need to get maximum rent from the house he is living in in order to fund their retirement.
Why are your parents continuing to fund him? Are they scared that he will turn away from them?
Believe me, I have a sponge for an oldest brother who regularly abused my mother in the same phone call that he was asking for money. Whilst one friend of my mother called her "an enabler" it was much more complicated than that. My mother (no longer with us) gave him money to help him to live in a different city. She didn't give him cash but would pay his vehicle rego, gap payments for dental, things like that.
She was worried that if he couldn't afford to live in a different city, he would come back to Brisbane and she very much didn't want that. She was protecting all of us from having to deal with him. I never want to see him again for what he has done to our family but once my father is gone, that is what I have to look forward to, administering dad's estate which involves looking after him.
Why are your parents continuing to fund him? Are they scared that he will turn away from them?
Believe me, I have a sponge for an oldest brother who regularly abused my mother in the same phone call that he was asking for money. Whilst one friend of my mother called her "an enabler" it was much more complicated than that. My mother (no longer with us) gave him money to help him to live in a different city. She didn't give him cash but would pay his vehicle rego, gap payments for dental, things like that.
She was worried that if he couldn't afford to live in a different city, he would come back to Brisbane and she very much didn't want that. She was protecting all of us from having to deal with him. I never want to see him again for what he has done to our family but once my father is gone, that is what I have to look forward to, administering dad's estate which involves looking after him.