Money Irresponsibility - Needs - Wants

It is there life.

And I would rather have a happy, but irrespondible, spender in my family than a smug, know it all and condescending saver.

At least the irresponsible ones don't have a constant note of derision and arrogance in what they say.

If someone is an adult, who cares?

Their family & loved ones might care cause they see somethign that the person doesn't.

Why is everyone talking in such extremes - irrepsonbilbe spender or condecending saver etc ?

I can;t see how Alex is sayign anythign differnt to someone like Richard Kiosaki in his books, but Alex has an actual concern for her brother whom she loves, Richard was just telling a story for us to buy off him so that he could bank the money.

I think Alex's heart is in the right place.
 
Well as long as they don't ask for bailouts aaaaaaall the time.

Incidentally, we're the madly saving low-debt ones in our family - on my partner's side anyway - and they get all uppity because THEY give us MONEY for birthdays like its such a big deal. And they give us hand-me-down frypans, food parcels, second hand clothes, on the rare occasions they visit they bring quite average food from the city (which is cold/soggy by the time it gets to us) etc etc. They've never seen our new house and haven't looked around the town we live in to realise that we're actually quite well off and have everything we need right here. I guess the fact that we've had the same car for 9 years and don't live in Burnside means we must be destitute. Wouldn't be so bad if it didn't come with that little tone of condescension.

Don't get the same attitude from my side of the family, who are quite the odd mix ranging from living paycheque to paycheque to the stereotypical scrooge with over $1M in the bank. When they give us second hand stuff it usually comes with "take what you want and if you don't want any, whatever, we'll give it to charity". Which admittedly has happened an awful lot lately as my mother is STILL going through her mother's things ... but I won't say no to things like a mulchmaker, sledgehammers, wooden cotton reels, pots, hoses ... :)

Edit: our block is very long. Hoses are good! lol
 
it's 64bit computing these days, that way you can really utilise those 8gb or 12gb ram.

i am quite cheap as a person, so cheap that i will only buy new shoe if that shoe has really worn out and had few holes here and there. even so i will make sure new shoe only costs less than 50 dollar

i will only buy anything with discounts, i think it's the feeling knowing im getting a bargain that makes me doing it. I want quality stuff but with lots of discounts, the lower the price the happier i am :D

anyway i think your brother is justified to buy anything he likes, as long as if that thing is something that is very useful to him. I dont have an ipad (im using asus transformer) but i couldnt see myself spending 500 dollar on an item that i dont think that much of a use until i found out about asus transformer (with keyboard dock) which was perfect for me.

he probably use the tablet like i do, i play with my little girl (she is 10 months) and show her some sesame street videos on youtube and i will be able to read news and emails with her sleeping on my side (or else i would have to sit in front of pc) so at the end of the day, it's how justifiable your purchase is

this year i bought asus transformer (work and personal use), video recording (got my little one first steps recorded), dslr camera (photos of my little one, our holiday etc). all at discount prices. could i use the money elsewhere? i probably could but i think everyone knows what's important to them

everything has a price, however the usefulness of your purchase and memories you are getting out of it is priceless
 
Without reading through the whole thread, did you say your brother is living in your parents' IP "rent free"?

This, for me, would be the sticking point. Why should he spend whatever he likes when he is living rent free?

Apart from that, I'd let him do what he wants, and try not to let it bother you.
 
Without reading through the whole thread, did you say your brother is living in your parents' IP "rent free"?

This, for me, would be the sticking point. Why should he spend whatever he likes when he is living rent free?

yep, you read right and he has has been living rent free in mum and dads IP for the past 15 years!

He:
Lives rent free
Has no savings
Gets help from his parents with bills
Spends money on toys

Its sad. It really is
 
With your mum and dad approaching retirement, it may be an idea to encourage them to seek independent advice regarding their finances. If they gift a large amount to your brother it will certainly affect any pension they can receive, as any gift is treated as a deprived asset and they will have any pension entitlement reduced accordingly for 5 years from the date of the gift.

Yes good point. thanks for bringing this up :)
 
yep, you read right and he has has been living rent free in mum and dads IP for the past 15 years!

He:
Lives rent free
Has no savings
Gets help from his parents with bills
Spends money on toys

Its sad. It really is

Do you have other siblings? Will your parents make provision in their will to make up for the huge financial benefit he has received for rent free living for 15 years (plus however many more years he benefits), not to mention the other help with his bills?

I know some will think that this issue is nothing to do with you or any other siblings, but I have seen how it can tear a family apart. I have seen this in my husband's family.
 
Without reading through the whole thread, did you say your brother is living in your parents' IP "rent free"?

This, for me, would be the sticking point. Why should he spend whatever he likes when he is living rent free?

Apart from that, I'd let him do what he wants, and try not to let it bother you.

Why would you care if he's living rent free or not and not care about the other thigngs mentioned ?

I'm the exact opposite, I coudn't care less say if my brother got a couple of $ free from mum & dad or free rent...& I missed out..........

I'm more conerned if he understands his future needs and is doing something aobut it while he can... ie a genuine concern for his future...
 
Why would you care if he's living rent free or not and not care about the other thigngs mentioned ?

I'm the exact opposite, I coudn't care less say if my brother got a couple of $ free from mum & dad or free rent...& I missed out..........

I'm more conerned if he understands his future needs and is doing something aobut it while he can... ie a genuine concern for his future...

Because, let's say he is living in a house that would rent for $300 per week, then just this year alone he is being handed the equivalent of $15,600. What if that house would rent for $400 per week ($20,800). That adds up to a whole lot of money over 15 years, plus however many more years he takes advantage of his parents.

Multiplied out over 15 years plus however much longer he plans on sponging on his parents, well... it adds up to about the value of a house.

As a sibling, I would not be happy about that. If you would be, then good on you Jaycee.

Personally, I would be happy for my sibling to live rent free due to a personal need like a marriage breakdown, and would not want to be compensated. However, if he was given cheap or free housing due to spending his money on "toys" I would not be happy.

I have personally witnessed the almost complete breakdown of my husband's family through very similar circumstances.

AlexP has said her brother spends all his money on toys and cannot pay his bills. Isn't it about time he stood up and acted like a man?

So, it is not just me being greedy, but because of how AlexP has spelt out her family dynamics that I would be really unhappy if I was in her shoes with a brother who happily spends all his money on "stuff" whilst taking advantage of his parents.

Just saying...

P.S. I'm sorry AlexP if I have made assumptions about your brother, your family dynamic etc, but I am just going by what you have written. Apologies if I have jumped to wrong conclusions.
 
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I'm more conerned if he understands his future needs and is doing something aobut it while he can... ie a genuine concern for his future...

Really... if he had a genuine concern for his future, wouldn't he stop buying "toys", man up and pay his parents for some rent, even a discounted rent.

Unless, of course, he has some illness or something else preventing him from doing so.
 
I'm more conerned if he understands his future needs and is doing something aobut it while he can... ie a genuine concern for his future...

Why :confused:.

There's a government safety net called Centerlink that he can always resort to in the future, if he isn't already now (being low income with a wife and kids).

What you're doing Jaycee is putting your standards on others.
 
Alex P, I completely and utterly understand your total bewilderment about your brother's choices.

There are many many people I know who perpetually do the same kind of thing over and over and over again.

Why why why why why can't they see that they are setting themselves up for a sad and miserable old-age of relying on meagre government support, waiting in pain for elective surgery, going to bed early to save on heating bills, having to decide whether to eat or pay the phone bill, etc, etc, etc, etc?????

I just dont get it!! :confused:

Surely these 'toys' and trinkets aren't worth it!!

Yes, of course it IS possible to live it up in the present, but NOT at the expense of our futures!! How can they not see that, for goodness sake!! How??

But there is no answer, we are what we are.

I hope that you will keep trying to help your kind-hearted parents to see the consequences of their choices to continually prop-up your brother.

And I am SO sorry for the ranting, this is a 'hot button' issue for me I'm afraid. :eek:

Best wishes. :)
 
Why :confused:.

There's a government safety net called Centerlink that he can always resort to in the future, if he isn't already now (being low income with a wife and kids).

What you're doing Jaycee is putting your standards on others.

I thought I just aked a question, I didnt pass any judgement on anyone, well I should say, I didn't mean to.

I took Alex as expressing concern for her brother and the way he is not being reponsible and the effect that would have for him later on.

As to why I might feel that way for my own brother, cause I hope that he will be able to see past the toy and the immediate short lived pleasures of some spending and start investing for hisfuture for his own benefit, I don't know why, probably cause I think we both can so for some reason (a strange form of kniship perhaps), I wish good things for him.

But I don't think he's being dangerous in anyway, so need for me to warn him of anything, I just wonder if he realises things that I do now, knowing that only a few years ago I didn't realise them myelf.

Perhaps if being irrepsonsible with all his money & living with our mum for free, I might think mum should cahrge him so he sees that he has it good and what reality I normally like, and probalby will be like for him..

But just me peronally, if mum decided not to charge him for rent, who am I to say to her she should do different if she beleives it suits her and her standards ? Likewise, why should I feel ripped off or whatever the appropriate term is for him getting free rent, if I don't feel ripped off or whatever the appropraite term is ?
 
Alex P, I completely and utterly understand your total bewilderment about your brother's choices.

There are many many people I know who perpetually do the same kind of thing over and over and over again.

Why why why why why can't they see that they are setting themselves up for a sad and miserable old-age of relying on meagre government support, waiting in pain for elective surgery, going to bed early to save on heating bills, having to decide whether to eat or pay the phone bill, etc, etc, etc, etc?????

I just dont get it!! :confused:

Surely these 'toys' and trinkets aren't worth it!!

Yes, of course it IS possible to live it up in the present, but NOT at the expense of our futures!! How can they not see that, for goodness sake!! How??

But there is no answer, we are what we are.

I hope that you will keep trying to help your kind-hearted parents to see the consequences of their choices to continually prop-up your brother.

And I am SO sorry for the ranting, this is a 'hot button' issue for me I'm afraid. :eek:

Best wishes. :)

I thnk most don't Theresa, which I why I've learned o much on a forum such as this form people who do and have seen this and the different ways they see things and then prioroitises, spedn time learning & doing things related to this and I noticed how most people quite simply don't seem to.
 
... and responsible for their own choices. Unfortunately so many are not.

and we've discusd why that is so many times too..

Why did Kyosaki need to write that so obvious book for me to get it ? and I know I am far from alone, even some other forum members have suggested the same for themselves.
 
Why did Kyosaki need to write that so obvious book for me to get it ? and I know I am far from alone, even some other forum members have suggested the same for themselves.

I think the trick with RK's book/s is that he writes it in such an easy-to-get way, which all of us who read it can easily understand and go with.

The comparison of the two dad's who were (seemingly) from similar upbringings and backgrounds, yet ended up so vastly different financially really pointed out the mindset involved, rather than the practices alone.

Interestingly, I still occasionally run into folk who read his book, and reckon his stuff was cr@p, and they are oft financially well behind.

Horses and water.
 
But why did he have a ready audience who admitted being awakened to a new way of thinking because of the succesful way he put it together ?

He outlined solution and suggested they were practical for the reader.

Formally I don't think we don't get that we don't get told there is a problem / solution to think about.. Just get on with it.. we see others getting on with it .. hear life isn't supposed to be eay and get on with getting on like everyone else... doesn't alway hsve to make sense and that sense of 'now' we lal have i of course to blame as well, cause ther examples and lessons around us at this time I'm talking about above, but bloody human nature means most don't think they can cause they see most don't.. or something like that I think..

But I gues what other are saying also is you can only lead a horse to water..
 
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