Resigning due to bullying?

Discussion in 'Legal Issues' started by wylie, 1st Apr, 2012.

  1. Deena

    Deena Member

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    To be fair, I have only skimmed read this thread.

    Now if I read this right, you love this job, so why should you resign. Surely this employer has policys covering all scenarios, and surely this includes one on bullying.

    I think you should report this person, first by speaking to the next immediate superior, know the policy so you can quote it if they try to sweep your complaint away. Sometimes these things actually need to be formalised before they will take any action.

    Gone are the days when people just pulled them aside and had a word to them, although I still will talk to someone about thier behaviour, if there is no resolution I then take it higher.

    Good luck, chin up.

    There have been some doozey responses here....................!!!
     
  2. Dazz

    Dazz Banned

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    What ?? On a scale of 1 to 10 where 1 is a princess simply moaning and 10 is a real-life situation that many thousands of employees who need the job face every day, this fluff rates about a 2.

    I'm guessing that sarah888 doesn't operate in the real world.
     
  3. kathryn d

    kathryn d Member

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    I do find it interesting how males and females view a situation.

    men will get into each others faces, punch and shove, curse each other out..and then have a beer together.

    Women...no way.
     
  4. wylie

    wylie Member

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    I'm guessing that makes me just above a moaning princess. Oh goody!!

    If it affects me, it is real to me. One man's fluff is another man's reality.

    And one more thing Dazz. I asked a simple question. I didn't expect to give as much information as I have. This is NOT a huge problem for me, but a niggle, an annoyance but something that does impact slightly on my life. I simply was curious to know if I could get into legal trouble if I made a statement with my (possible future) resignation.

    If it was bigger than that for me, I would have resigned by now, or have reported her bullying (or whatever it could be called, extreme unprofessionalism perhaps?).

    What I would add also is that I know of four young people who have suicided very recently, two just this week. One I knew personally, the others were work colleagues and children of people I know.

    Could I suggest that people belittling the "problems" of others in the belief that those problems are "fluff" is unhelpful and in at least some of these suicides could possibly have had a bearing on the end result. If you think you are alone with a problem, where can you turn? If you ask advice, and are told your issue is just "fluff" that could be enough to tip you over the edge.

    In the light of these very sad deaths I've heard of just this week, I think perhaps it is time people acknowledged that something that is "fluff" to them, could be way more important to the person asking for help or advice.

    Have a think on that Dazz? One day one of your daughters may be bullied in the workforce or at school. Will you tell them to "man up" and that their piddly little problem is just at the level of a moaning princess? Maybe you'll tell them there are thousands worse off than them and they should just suck it up?
     
    Last edited: 5th Apr, 2012
  5. sarah888

    sarah888 Member

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    Hi Dazz,

    I've been reading these boards for a while now and understand that you seem to enjoy expressing contraversial opinions designed to get a rise out of people. I find it quite disappointing you would take this to the extreme of suggesting Wylie's experience is "fluff".

    You previously mentioned that you are no longer actively involved in the workforce. With respect, I would suggest that you may not be the best qualified to comment on what is appropriate in today's organisations.

    It's okay mate, I "operate in the real world" so can certainly fill you in on how things work if you'd like some advice. ;)
     
  6. pennyk

    pennyk Member

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    What I dont understand about your responses, Dazz, is that you dont seem to see how the bottom line of the business is negatively impacted by this type of situation.... which I would have thought would have been a primary motivator for a business owner.

    I know there are plenty of people who just moan about their workplace.... but to just ignore bad managers and assume that workers are in the wrong results in lost revenue.

    It is so expensive to recruit and train workers. So, a bullying or even ineffective people manager costs businesses money....... even before you consider the reduced performance that results from workers who are unmotivated/ berated by their boss.

    I have been very successful in growing the turnover and profitability of the business I work in (which is a large multinational, but still a family owned business). I would say 70-80% of that success is directly attributable to employing/ training and retaining good people and at the same time, dealing assertively with people who are underperforming. As soon as there have been team issues, there is a clear and significant reduction in sales related to that. It may not happen immediately, but the link is very clear.

    For me, managing people is just such a foundational business success factor, I dont understand why a business owner wouldnt have it as one of their top priorities
     
  7. Dazz

    Dazz Banned

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    ...yes, I gathered that at the start...
     
  8. Dazz

    Dazz Banned

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    I find it disappointing, hence why I quoted you, that you use 'extreme' language to magnify everything when in fact it's nothing of the sort. As I said, I rate it about a 2, as does wylie - see above.

    If you're disappointed, see some about it.



    I never said I was the best qualified to comment....no-one is. I'd suggest that the clowns purporting to dictate what is "appropriate in todays orhanisations" nowadays wouldn't have a clue. I do not agree nor support all of the organisations you place such faith in to set "appropriate" level.


    Yes, that would be very handy - your skills would be most beneficial to me out here in dero unemployment land.
     
  9. D.T.

    D.T. Property Lookerafterer

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    Aww I wish I was in dero unemployment land too.:cool:
     
  10. Dazz

    Dazz Banned

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    ....well I suppose Penny, due to it being such a minor thing, like a level 2 bullying spat, I'm completely unconvinced it would affect the bottom line.

    Your multinational big team example might have merit, but wylie is talking about a grumpy State manager having a crack at a casual part-timer who couldn't give a fig about the company's goals and objectives.

    Maybe she resents her operation being treated like wylie's casual plaything, and is a wake up to the "I'm financially free and don't need this job nor care about the company" attitude. Completely understandable from where I sit. Many bosses won't tolerate that. None of mine ever would.

    The 'bad boss' claim hasn't been established as yet, that's just wylie's opinion, most likely tainted by the personal ruffling of feathers. No-one has seen the sales results to see one way or the other.

    Oh for the State manager to come on here and tell her side of the story. I reckon we'd get back to some reality, instead of what we see here, which has somehow descended into false suicide accusations ?? WTF ??
     
  11. wylie

    wylie Member

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    Again, so wrong on EVERY one of your claims about my job so I'll not bother rebuffing them individually. You jumped in at the start with NFI and you now try to defend that. What a laugh. You have no idea what you are talking about. Go away.
     
  12. Dan_p

    Dan_p Member

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    Bullies are not confined to the work place, the frequent forums as well
     
    aussierogue and wylie like this.
  13. Graemsay

    Graemsay Doom and Gloomer

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    It sounds as though your store's manager is being micromanaged or overruled by the Seagull.

    My suggestion would be that your manager has to deal with this. She's in a leadership position, and it's her responsibility to handle matters that are upsetting her patch.

    A rough plan of action could be:
    • Get her to discuss the problem with her peers in other stores. If it's a widespread problem then it's a serious shortcoming with her performance. If it's local, then it's a case that she's not letting go of her baby, as you suspect.
    • Have your manager discuss the matter with the Seagull's superior. An off the record chat could lead to a quiet word with the Seagull asking her to back off.
    • Stand up to the Seagull. If she's ranting in front of customers, then make the point that it's not productive. If she's complaining that you're not doing every last thing she requests then make the point that it's not her responsibility.
    • If all else fails, put in an official complaint to her superiors.
    If the head office is aware of a dispute between your store and the Seagull then it's going to be very difficult for her to recommend blanket sanctions.

    You mentioned psychiatric issues. Do you know what she's been diagnosed with? Some of it sounds like Borderline Personality Disorder, which is what my brother's ex-wife suffers with.

    If you know the problem then you can probably figure out how to handle it. A number of conditions involve different models of cognition. BPD involves the sufferer seeing the world in very black and white terms; Asperger's syndrome (or other high functioning forms of autism) has a cluster of symptoms, including sensory sensitivity, difficulty reading social cues, and maybe less flexible in how they think.
     
  14. wylie

    wylie Member

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    I have a relative with BPD so I know a little about it. His son has high functioning Aspergers, and his behaviour mirrors that of another boy I know quite well with the same. I know another boy, lovely boy, with ADHD and his behaviour mirrors hers more actually... impulsive blurting out without thinking "where am I standing, who is listening, is this appropriate?"

    I don't know if she is diagnosed with anything, but there is definitely a missing filter between her brain and her mouth, just like I have noticed in some with Aspergers. She is either neutral (never friendly) or ranting. One young casual was poached by the seagull who was very friendly until she turned on her one day and she ended in tears. She likened it to patting a dog who, without warning, bites you. Everything needs to be done right now, everything is a panic. Drives me nuts.

    I've a lot to ponder. Will I... won't I? I'll report back when things are more clear in my head.

    Part of me thinks "write an official complaint" and the other part of me thinks "why hasn't someone else... anyone else... done that?"

    That is why me not "needing" this job could be the answer. To make a complaint and then have to deal with her on a regular basis would be mightily uncomfortable, and I'm sure that is why nobody is game to do it.
     
  15. Dan_p

    Dan_p Member

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    Write it, get it official and documented. A lot of people are scared to put pen to paper, especially if they really need the job.
     
  16. Deena

    Deena Member

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    I think it is all to common in todays world, that we put up and shut up and don't take things further. I think you should so something officially Wylie, as I mentioned earlier look at the companys protocols about bullying. Once you do something officially whether it is putting pen to paper or speaking officially to the correct person, they can no longer sweep her behaviour under the mat.

    Should she then try to take things out on you and make things more uncomfortable once you have started the process, you just officially report that to.
     
  17. VYBerlinaV8

    VYBerlinaV8 Member

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    I worked for a sociopath once, she was an absolute fruitloop. So I resigned and went to another job.

    This person is well known in the industry I work in, and when people say "how did you find A", I simply respond with "she is the only person I've met in my career so far that I couldn't work for, so I resigned".

    What you have to decide is whether you want to go through the hassle and stress of trying to get a situation resolved (and frankly these things often don't get resolved until someone leaves), or simply take advantage of the most wonderful aspect of being an employee, and find another job.
     
  18. wylie

    wylie Member

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    I'm flip-flopping all over the place :D.

    I read a great post and think "I'll make an official complaint" and then I read one like this latest and think "I'll find another job".

    I'm just going to wait and see. If it pans out as people are saying it will and she flies in more often, I will be forced to make a decision one way or the other because I will NOT work with her on a daily basis.

    I've worked with many bosses, and like VYBerlinaV8 says, this is the first time I've thought of resigning rather than having to work with someone.

    I just want to thank those who offered thoughtful and helpful replies. I really do appreciate this forum so much.
     
  19. INVSTOR

    INVSTOR O+

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    I agree with VY Berlina, I'd just leave.
     
  20. BMan

    BMan learner property investor

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    i disagree to a point with VYBerlinaV8 for your situation

    you dont need the job so that gives you the ability to do what the others cant because they may need the job

    imo i would make the complaint if not for you but for everyone else in the company

    put it this way
    if you
    -resign, nothing happens (slight loss as you would work there if she wasnt there)
    -official complaint - nothing happens / it gets worse - you resign like you could of before making the complaint (atleast you tried)
    -official complaint - she gets fired/behaves - its a better workplace (win)