Is Private School Worth It?

[Pushka]

Well, I sent both children to Private schools from Day 1. A co-ed school for Primary, then one went co-ed for Secondary, the other, an all boys school. Neither have had any issues in dealing with girls. If you have a good public primary school close by then that is a good option. But remember the first few years of schooling are really vital in picking up learning issues; the later school years are vital in establishing good peer groups and the formulation of discipline codes.

There are no schools in SA which choose students on the basis of their abilities so that comment is wrong too, for SA anyway. Instead, both schools the kids went to actually select students who have a hearing disability or other learning problem as they are geared to deal with it.

So many incorrect assumptions about private schools here.

Both say it was worth it (although they didnt pay the bills!) It does depend on the local Public schools in your area. We didnt have a good secondary school close by - the nearest one was around 5 kms away and needed two bus trips to get there.

The 'look at me' mentality mentioned earlier is so off base and a very quaint and old fashioned view of private schools; if you have no experience of private schools then you dont know what you are talking about and are making assumptions; I worked for years to help pay the bills. So despite the 'apology', that comment is offensive.

 

[Dazz]

going to private, is more a show of the "look at me" from the parents.

Agreed kathryn d.


At a large dinner party last month for 12 couples, a fellow investor lent across and suggested that of his two boys, he'd dearly love to send one to private school and one to public school, and invest the significant differential over the years to see what the difference was upon graduation.


I thought it was a novel approach, and suggested he put his notion to the other folk in the room for their thoughts.


He hadn't even finished putting his proposal forward for comment before all of the women in the room bar none (smattering of teachers / nurses / business owners) howled him down in protest. None of the men commented. It died a very quick death.


All of the men, bar none (high earning self employed chaps mostly around 50 to 55) afterwards in the snooker room quietly reflected it was a splendid idea, but were too **** weak to say anything for fear of upsetting their ladies entrenched views.


....and hence how many a 'family decision' nowadays about whether to go private school or not is arrived at.

 

[Pushka]

At a large dinner party last month for 12 couples, a fellow investor lent across and suggested that of his two boys, he'd dearly love to send one to private school and one to public school, and invest the significant differential over the years to see what the difference was upon graduation.


I suggested it was a novel approach, and after agreeing with him, suggested he put his notion to the other folk in the room for their thoughts..

or maybe the women were smart enough to not want their kids to be part of a 'social experimentation' exercise.

 

[Dazz]

Maybe Pushka - I guess we'll never know....and isn't that just the best thing about all of these subjects. Whichever way the wind blows.

 

[gcad]

You don't always have to fit the mould of public or private. Try a bit of both - ie. Send them to a public school and hire private tutors for their weaker subjects. Teachers are not like tradies, teachers will work for peanuts - hire them on a one-on-one basis to teach your kids outside of school hours at your home. I found this approach very helpful when I was in high school - it got me into a law degree - which amounted to diddly-squat now that I am a tradie.

Fortunately I could afford to pay the HECS-debt back because I make decent coin as an electrician.

 

[poordeveloper]

So many incorrect assumptions about private schools here.

So true. I won't bother arguing the case for private schools here because most people seem to have made their minds up a long time ago and don't have the flexibility to consider alternatives. I wonder if most of the objections to private schools come from those who never attended one?

I don't have kids but if I did, I probably wouldn't place much weight on the opinions of posters on an anonymous internet forum when making such an important decision!

 

[kathryn d]

Thanks Dazz.

 

[AlmostBob]

Private school: Charles Windsor
Public School: Charles Manson
Private School: Neville Chamberlain
Public School: Dwight Eisenhower
Private School: Winston Churchill
Public School: Paul McCartney
All rather famous in their own way, how much due to school, how much due to the person.

 

[rugrat]

I went to nine different schools growing up (we moved around alot) and it really depends on the school. Having said that, I have found that there is a definite attitude difference in how the students relate to adults in the various schooling systems. At the private and catholic schools there does tend to be more respect towards the teachers and adults in general. I beleive that this has to do with the fact that private and catholic schools are able to be much stricter, because they have more freedom and felxibility in suspending and expelling 'trouble' students, whereas, public schools are often stuck with them. One 'trouble' student can disrupt the entire class.

Personally, I will be sending my kids to a Catholic primary school - not quite private, not quite public, and teaches the foundations of our religion. When thay ae old enough for high school I will reassess then - could be catholic, public or private - depends on what is available and what suits my kids needs best.

 

[eXc]

I know people that went through both, and to be honest, the difference is the parents, not the type of school. In fact, I'll say the public school kids are nicer people, and are in as good if not better jobs. The reason they are nicer is they went through realising they are equal to everyone else, whereas the private school kids often think they are better (not always)

If you as a parent do not assist, guide and discipline your kids, then they will not do well. IMO discipline is the biggest difference. Parents seem to think it is the schools responisilbity to discipline their kids, yet whinge when they get suspended.

Take the $12,000 a year and get a tutor for them later on in schooling.

As others have said, if the public school is really bad, then yeah ok, it's really bad, but in that case, just put them in a public school the next town over.

 

[eXc]

chuckle. I just got this email after my last post, sorta backs up the idea that it's the parents.


A mathematics teacher who agreed to baby-sit while her friend went shopping, left her this note: 'Dried tears 11 times... tied shoelaces 15 times... blew up balloons, 5 per child... warned kids not to cross the street 26 times... kids insisted on crossing the street 26 times. Number of Saturdays I'll volunteer to do this again - Zero!' The following 'Beatitudes for Parents' were written 45 years ago by Marion E. Kinneman when her daughters were raising her six grandsons. They're still spot-on!

'Blessed are those who make peace with spilled milk and mud, for of such is the kingdom of childhood. Blessed is the parent who engages not in the comparison of his child with others, for precious unto each is the rhythm of his own growth. Blessed are those who have learned to laugh, for it's the music of a child's world. Blessed and mature are those who without anger can say 'No,' for comforting to a child is the security of firm decisions. Blessed is the gift of consistency, for it brings heart's-ease in childhood.

Blessed are they who accept the awkwardness of growth, for they are aware of the choice between marred furnishings and damaged personalities. Blessed are the teachable, for knowledge brings understanding and understanding brings love. Blessed are the men and women, who in the midst of the unpromising mundane, give love, for they bestow the greatest of all gifts to each other, to their children, and, in an ever-widening circle, to their fellowmen.'

One successful entrepreneur said, 'I may be a self-made man, but the blueprints came from my mum and dad.' Bottom line: 'Children... learn... from their parents.' What are you teaching yours?

 

[weg]

I know people that went through both, and to be honest, the difference is the parents, not the type of school. In fact, I'll say the public school kids are nicer people, and are in as good if not better jobs. The reason they are nicer is they went through realising they are equal to everyone else, whereas the private school kids often think they are better (not always).

There are a few assumptions there. I bet a few people could easily assume the opposite too .

If you as a parent do not assist, guide and discipline your kids, then they will not do well. IMO discipline is the biggest difference. Parents seem to think it is the schools responisilbity to discipline their kids, yet whinge when they get suspended.

The school and families should work together. That's when you see the biggest difference. This results in fewer suspensions and fewer problems overall and allows the schools to do what they're there for... to educate.

Take the $12,000 a year and get a tutor for them later on in schooling.

I'd rather the child grasp the basics early on and not have to tutor later in schooling. Early on is very important for future learning. Don't underestimate it.

As others have said, if the public school is really bad, then yeah ok, it's really bad, but in that case, just put them in a public school the next town over.

Not that easy and infact it's even harder here in SA now that the policy regarding siblings has changed (now not allowing younger siblings to automatically attend the same public school as the elder sibling/s).

 

[MJD]

I sent my son to private for kindy just early this year, very happy with the school and the kid's performance both acedamic and social skills. it's amazing to see how the kid 've grown .To me it's worth every cent ( I don't take the idea of "look at me" or "keep up with the Jones" into account) .
If I can afford without any hurt in budget or investment, why not ?? it's part my investment anyway.

 

[aussierogue]

Me too

I am grappling with the same issues as i have 2 young Kids.

My question for private school parents is this - Is there a price where a private school becomes too expensive?

I agree with the idea that if you have money then why not but i grapple with opportunity cost in terms of

- what else you could do with your money
- needing to work harder and longer and the stress involved
- needing a spouse to return to work

For me this comes at a preice and i am wondering at what price does this become a 'lemming execrice' - keeping up with the Joneses, and at what price is it considered good value.

Surely at some point we all have to make a Value decision as to the benefits vs cost and I reckon at 20 k per year that tipping point is approaching.

BTW - i have never heard a private school parent admit that the kids are sent in order to 'keep up with the joneses' or ' for 'status reasons'. Most commentators would agree that these are some of the biggest subconscious motivators though.

(I went to a selective boys high school)

Cheers
Aussie

 

[Casserole Dish]

We are also at the start of this schooling journey with our kids.

Both hubby and I were public kids through and through. After that experience we are working (and investing) to get our kids in the private system for high school no matter what.

Was happy to just stick with the local public for primary but am now crossing my fingers she gets in at the Catholic school (we aren't Catholic). We have been interviewed etc and are awaiting the nod.

At the open day at the public school they had spelt Tuesday wrong (missed the 's') in the powerpoint presentation and it all went downhill from there. At the open day at the Catholic school I actually felt welcomed and was very impressed with all that I saw. No first names for the teachers, respect for the parents and each other etc etc. There is encouragment/incentive for, not only the slower learners, but also the other end of the scale - this was a big issue for me. The fees and contributions don't seem too bad either (if $ is a consideration)

Without going into too many details ie. our kids personalities etc I really feel the public system wouldn't be the best for us. I know it wasn't for me, but my parents had no options.

There are too many variables and only you know what to choose. You need to get to open days or tours and ask heaps of questions and feel the 'vibe' of the schools.

Gee this parenting thing is tough isn't it? Good luck and let us know what you decide!

 

[weg]

aussierogue,

You really don't have to pay 22k per year for private. There are many great but cheaper schools around just as there are great public schools.

A school at 5K per year can be equally as good as one twice the price and requires a non working spouse to work very part time to afford that. Not everyone that goes private is wealthy and most don't work extra hours at all.

Infact only a handful of mothers in my younger childs class work fulltime. Many aren't wealthy but are smart with money (most of my childrens friends own IP's too).

At the end of the day it's a personal decision where you chose to spend your money and what you think will benefit your child but if you manage your finances well your options increase without an increase in your stress levels.

 

[josko]

I know people that went through both, and to be honest, the difference is the parents, not the type of school. In fact, I'll say the public school kids are nicer people, and are in as good if not better jobs. The reason they are nicer is they went through realising they are equal to everyone else, whereas the private school kids often think they are better (not always)

If you as a parent do not assist, guide and discipline your kids, then they will not do well. IMO discipline is the biggest difference. Parents seem to think it is the schools responisilbity to discipline their kids, yet whinge when they get suspended.

Take the $12,000 a year and get a tutor for them later on in schooling.

As others have said, if the public school is really bad, then yeah ok, it's really bad, but in that case, just put them in a public school the next town over.

I believe this applies to the schools in my area. I have a friend with one child in Grammar and the other in Public.

She placed her eldest in Grammar as she chose to move from Sydney without really researching the area she moved to in regards to schooling. Her zoning placed her eldest in a very low socio-economic area. Let's just say that she pulled her child out of that public school after a few months and placed him in Grammar.

She moved to a better suburb and placed her second child in the Public School at that suburb.

Her choice: Public.

We are lucky that we have a fantastic little Public School with great parents. I had enrolled my eldest in Grammar for Yr7 onwards but after hearing what most of the parents are like and as a result..their children...I know my children will be just fine in Public School.

Apparently if your child is a sportsman then Grammar here is the go. If more intellectual - Public or Private doesn't seem to matter. I believe that as long as they have a good, well adjusted set of friends then they will be just fine.

The decision has to be made on the demographic you live in, and what those schools near you are actually like.

Regards JO

 

[Dazz]

My question for private school parents is this - Is there a price where a private school becomes too expensive?

Fantastic question Aussie. This was the number one question that all of the husbands had at our dinner party, constantly repeated throughout the night. I guess they weren't happy with the responses they heard.


The united responses from the wives, sung in chorus, ad nauseum was "It doesn't matter what it costs, we think it's great value, and if you are strapped for cash, then get off your bony @$$ and start earning more fella."


I guess that wasn't what the father's wanted to hear.

 

[wealth101]

I am not sure if it is worth it or not but our boys (in private) are quite active and happy. I grew up in a working suburbs, attended public High school (not selective). Kids attending Private Highschool is our a personal choice. I do believe there are selective public schools that are quite good and worth a look. We discussed before we had kids that we will send them to private highschool (husband family tradition). Also sending kids to Private would not be hard either if you plan early. We enrolled our twins to 2 Private schools when they were few months old (no waiting list and guarantee place..) and at the same time also started the journey paying off our ppor and buy shares and IPs. We sent them to a catholic in Primary years though. By the time they got to Highschool we were debt free on ppor and capital growth on IPs and shares has been more than enough to cover the yearly $40k school fees. thanks God, it has been a smooth journey so far.
Cheers, Tracey

 

[sue78]

aussierogue - i think if you can afford to and want to then why not? however, there are ppl that are struggling to afford fees and I think that's just silly. My nephew goes to Wesley and it's $20k pa from Prep. Due to the financial crisis, a lot of kids have pulled out. My bro is doing really well but still it's a hugely stressful and burdensome to afford private schooling for 2 kids at Wesley.

I say between $3 to $8k max.

I don't know the reasons why you invest in property but for us, it's to afford a better lifestyle and afford the best for our kids to our best ability.

If I do manage to pay for 3 kids through private schooling I would definitely consider it a great achievement.