Dirty Auction Tricks

Gotham

Gotham

Hi Guys
RE agents have been using dirty tricks to inflate the price at auctions for decades. Things such as dummy bidders or inflating the crowd by underquoting.
Does anybody know of any dirty little tricks to bring the price DOWN at an auction? Like leaving a few syringes scattered around the front gate? Or a few empty beer bottles wrapped in paper bags. Or maybe inviting a few aboriginal friends and getting them to dress loiter like undesirables?
Any fun suggestions would be enormously welcome... I really want this property!
rob :D
 
Gotham said:
Hi Guys
RE agents have been using dirty tricks to inflate the price at auctions for decades. Things such as dummy bidders or inflating the crowd by underquoting.
Does anybody know of any dirty little tricks to bring the price DOWN at an auction? Like leaving a few syringes scattered around the front gate? Or a few empty beer bottles wrapped in paper bags. Or maybe inviting a few aboriginal friends and getting them to dress loiter like undesirables?
Any fun suggestions would be enormously welcome... I really want this property!
rob :D
Click to expand...

I heard of a guy who hired the local chapter of the Gipsy Jokers bikie gang to park either side of the house and rev their harleys and general stand uncomfortably close to anyone else who was bidding...

Not sure if this is an urban myth though... :rolleyes:
 
Gotham said:
Hi Guys
Or maybe inviting a few aboriginal friends and getting them to dress loiter like undesirables?
Any fun suggestions would be enormously welcome... I really want this property!
rob :D
Click to expand...

Yeah.. sounds like fun..!! How ingenious.. especially love the aboriginal friends bit... There couldn't be a better way to stereotype the already underpreviliged section of our society..!!!

good work Gotham
 
My friend, I believe you just did the stereotyping. I have had some great aboriginal friends in my life and any one of them would have been in it for the lark!
 
The Aboriginal one was a very early Fast Forward sketch, with Ernie Dingo the Aboriginal shouting over the fence from the neighbour's place.
 
instead of leaving the beer bottles syringes around the house for auction, leave them around the house next door. loud music would always help. how about a punk rock band practising on a sat morn at 10am.... or playing Elvis music really loud.....the same song over and over during inspections and auction......

how about paying the neighbour to stage a domestic during the auction. if someone offered a $1000 to argue loudly with my partner, she'd probably oblige.

how about getting a friend to act handicapped in the neighbour's backyard, and run around half naked, laughing hysterically, spraying the auction attendees with a hose......or squatting in the backyard making loud poo noises.

put 6 angry pig dogs in the next door neighbour's yard, and have them snapping at anyone who came within 10 metres .

arrange to park a lot of hotted up cars outside the neighbours....

bad smells would always work a treat.....how about a ton of dynamic lifter freshly spread....

of course, the thing is to get the neighbours to cooperate. if they aren't likely, then you could always send them a letter including two tickets to the Sheraton mirage for the weekend (and free yard maintenance while away) as a prize for some competition they never entered.....
 
About 15 years ago the housing commision sold off the local shopping centres it owned in Mt Druitt. The tenants in mine all pooled together to buy ours at the Auction.

The solicitor who was bidding for us, got some the people involved in the sydicate to ask some petty confusing technical questions relating to the existing leases and rates just prior to bidding starting . Don't know if it had any effect , BUT , ours was the only centre that didn't reach it's reserve price, and I think we only had one competing bidder. As highest bid , we negotiated a sale shortly after which was considerably lower than what we were expecting to pay.

See Change
 
How about paying some kids to be painful and noisy.

Another one would be to get your hand on some "crime scene" tape and surround a few houses next door with it. ALternatively hire some police uniforms and get a few "police" to patrol the street repeatedly.

An electrical guitar next door would also do the trick. I once inspected a property which was being blasted during open time by a neighbour on his electric guitar. The agent was so unimpressed when I told him I wouldn't consider the place with neighbours like that!
 
A close friend of mine borrowed a bright red Ferrari from a business associate and they drove to the auction in such a manner that every one noticed. It apparently shocked other bidders out of a bidding war and he got the property cheaper than he anticipated. It was for his new PPOR.

wombat
 
Seeing there are all sorts of professionals now that service us (brokers, accountants etc) I am proud to announce my new business.

Auction (goon) Squad

For a set fee (no trailing commissions or free holidays for me) I will assure you the fewest possible competing bidders.

My employees are all ex-con, electric guitar playing, pyschotic 1% bikers who enjoy the odd "religous ceremony" on Saturday afternoon. For an additional fee we can throw in a "live" IV drug overdose just as bidding started. Of course an ambulance will be shortly on the scene. Immeadiately after thier arrival after there will of course be a violent intercation between the ambos and the nieghbours.

Any "over enthusatic" competing bidders will be "spoken to" in an effective manner and encouraged not to be bid again, ever. It would help if we could know in adavnce of who these people may be as its our experience we are more effective when a citizen sees a photo of thier loved ones at this time. Obviously our connections with the Real estate agents should facilitate this process.

We have also found that by targeting the most expensive looking car in the street for a graffiti attack and stereo extracation by our "apprentices" - (push bike riding vandals packing spray cans) we can increase our success. We suggest you hire such a vehicle from one of the larger rental car company's for this purpose but make sure you pay the extra to reduce the excess. For a small fee we can also put you in touch with some folks who would be happy to see thier own car "disappear or be written off". For those of you with creative accountants the income from such a deal can be used to offset our fees.

Should these tactics not be totally effective, our "Gold Level Service" includes our most devasting tactic. Joanna Grigg. More of that at the first consulation, which is obviously free.

Please feel free to contact me on the number below to discuss our service in detail.

Phone Lucy Fer on 846 7666

PS we also do tennant removals - for free - just because we like it.

Have a safe and happy day.

:rolleyes:
 
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