Growing up poor
- Thread starter redwing
- Start date
Atlas does a lot of shrugging around here!
Those adults are a product of their upbringing. As most of those kids will also be if something isn't done to detonate that suburb. I can't see how blaming the people who have never known better helps but I too am a bit slow on the uptake sometimes...
There but for the grace of God go I.
But I grew up in that - albeit with lower middle class parents.
A lot of kids I went to school with didn't have a chance. They come from that background and don't know much else.
It's more about providing information about alternatives.
I volunteer a lot of time to a really good smith family initiative which is about talking to kids from that background about what they can do with life. I've done it for a few years now, but in the last 2 years I've had 2 very different kids. The first ended up with a scholarship for architecture at uni. The second dropped out of school to start a signwriting apprenticeship.
The fact that both have made nicest to get away from their upbringing is really inspiring.
I guess I just can't imagine what it's like for a child to grow up in that sort of environment. But I'm highly confident that if I had to do that my life would be a similar basket case to what can be seen there right now. I just wouldn't have had the stomach to deal with that sort of %$#@ at that age...
First of all; I'm not that insensitive that I'd ever tell anyone to their face they were inadequate, stupid etc.
I might discuss it here behind closed doors so-to-speak with folk, but that's it.
Maybe that's the problem; maybe no-on gave him (whoever "he" is that you're referring to - I wasn't referring to anyone in particular) a big enough kick in the pants as a kid and said do some bloody work or you won't be going up to grade 4 next year, and so on.
But no; instead; got the PC touchy-feely garbage that permeates the society and education department of today.
Hell; a kid can't even fail a test anymore; it might stunt their development or something.
They need to be tested and put under some pressure - like life is.What sort of an education is that, where out in the real world as an adult if you fail, you fail and you can be sure no-one will be there with hankies most likely. They just take your house, or license, or freedom.
And then they cry about how unfair it all is on them, and how victimised they are etc.
We all know that. I'm referring to the lazy ones who are allowed to let slip through the system these days by your lot (and their lazy parents who won't put in the time with them to read and do homework at home etc)..
Not saying it's your fault; it's the system.
And, if there are kids who legitimately can't learn to rear or write ( I don't believe that this is the case personally - especially when I've seen a man with no arms or legs who can swim), then identify them and place them in special classes to cater to their learning disability.
See above.
I don't believe they "can't" - sadly; they are allowed to slip through the cracks.
I'll betcha those welfare adults who supposedly can't read or write can handle all the necessary paperwork to collect their welfare and process the steps to get the cash.......
I'll bet my house the vast majority of those welfare adults are not intellectually challenged; just lazy and chose the path of least resistence their whole lives.
Being a success at anything in life takes a fair bit if hard work, application and dedication; school, sport, getting a degree, bringing up kids who are healthy and well adjusted - it's all bloody hard work and it's up to everyone to put in the work they think they should.
Many don't, and pay their price in various ways.
Top line execs etc aren't clock watchers and go-slowers; this is one example.
This might be my next life choice; teaching kids who can't read or write to do so.
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I know plenty of asians with university degrees who cant spell my wife is one. many know jack **** about everything, have jobs that should require good qualification, but only get there by nepotism.
it's a matter of pride and where it's placed.
you place the pride within yourself, you'd be ashamed if you can't spell and want to better yourself (unlikely you'd be in the spot in the first place, though).
if you place the pride outside yourself - ie rely on OTHERS to be proud of you - then you have this looming sense of failure to admit you can't spell and have "let people down".
it comes back to self confidence and the tall poppy syndrome, specifically peer pressure around tall poppies at a young age.
and if it's reinforced by parents - it's a very difficult cycle to break.
but dont heap wang on people who cant spell. if their parents were disinterested in their education, then there's little support other than teachers, squid.
Would depend on their age,most not all on the wrong side of 55 years of age who worked in a government office would spell well,someone like myself who only went too grade ten did a apprentership and worked with their hands all their life,,maybe it would be a different story,plus a know people who would have 20 mill plus that would not be able too spell more then ten words,but not be able to spell never ever stopped them..
There's always a lot of focus on the kids, but I think a lot of it should be focus on the parents.
For starters parenting classes (these don't have to be that they demean a person), job/skills training, compulsory volunteer work, like cleaning up the district, gardening in the suburb, school involvement, etc. should be a condition to collecting welfare long term.
Expensive yes, but so is welfare and the social problems associated with generational unemployment.
If a parent is easily accessing beneficial and supportive programs, and their attitude improves, the children gain as a result.
Even helping a small percentage of families is a great result.
It take more than giving more money to these poor families.
For starters parenting classes (these don't have to be that they demean a person), job/skills training, compulsory volunteer work, like cleaning up the district, gardening in the suburb, school involvement, etc. should be a condition to collecting welfare long term.
Expensive yes, but so is welfare and the social problems associated with generational unemployment.
If a parent is easily accessing beneficial and supportive programs, and their attitude improves, the children gain as a result.
Even helping a small percentage of families is a great result.
It take more than giving more money to these poor families.
So the onus is back on yourself to go "Hey! I want to be able to spell, so dammit; I'll learn no matter what".
Speaking of disinterested parents (why have kids at all if that's your attitude, I say); one of my son's mate's Mother was bleating to us (and she's a Mrs.Thong in trakkies and moccies type I'll add) about how her 7 year old daughter was struggling with her spelling at school.
So, the school have sent her a note, or a phone call (can't remember now) asking her to spend more time helping the child with spelling and reading at home....
Her sooky comment to us was "It's the bloody school's job to teach her to read and spell; not mine".
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Agree 100% with weg.
Now days the government has brought in 'earn or learn' so that once a child goes to school single parents need to enrol in studies etc or get a job. I wonder how many will just add to their family as each child increases the welfare income.
In hindsight a portion of parents on welfare would benefit from basic living and hygiene skill classes along with budgeting and healthy eating choices.
Certificate I and Certificate II classes are basic skills. Certificate III courses are entry into workforce level.
Many, many years ago a work colleague (husband, wife and 4 kids) qualified for a housing commission home and moved in, she soon decided that that it was not the environment she wanted her family exposed and brought up in so they moved out and rented elsewhere, then she went back to work on night duty to save up for a small 2 bedroom house with a sleepout.
Regards
Sheryn
My family has been looking out for a young boy from a disadvantaged background for a few years. He has a very sad story, however he is the nicest kid.
My family has helped him open a bank account and save quite a bit of money, we've helped him get his drivers licence and helped him buy his first car.
The last two years we've taken him on several family holidays interstate - it was really so he could see there was so much more out there. He had never been more than about 10kms from his home... so Sydney was an eye opener for him.
He is the same age as my son and the difference is astonishing. His goal is to be the first person in his family to buy his own house.
My family has helped him open a bank account and save quite a bit of money, we've helped him get his drivers licence and helped him buy his first car.
The last two years we've taken him on several family holidays interstate - it was really so he could see there was so much more out there. He had never been more than about 10kms from his home... so Sydney was an eye opener for him.
He is the same age as my son and the difference is astonishing. His goal is to be the first person in his family to buy his own house.
That is a very admirable thing for your family to be doing Nemo30. On what basis is your family doing this? Don't want to pry but curious if it is something formal, like a foster situation? If not, is there jealousy or resentment from his parents for the care and help he is getting from your family? Does he live with your family (I guess you mean your parents)?
No, not formal. I dont want to say too much as I would hate to identify him.
No problems, I understand. I think it is a great thing for your family to do for someone
.
I guess this comes down to Rich Dad, Poor Dad again.
There's a difference between not having much money and being poor. For example, up until the age of two, I lived in a one bedroom apartment with my family of four. My parents did not have much money at all, but they never ever had that poor mentality. My clothes may have been hand-me-downs, but I never went hungry and always got everything I needed.
And while my parents were low on money, they were time rich and spent much of that time with us. Definitely better than the other way around!
There's a difference between not having much money and being poor. For example, up until the age of two, I lived in a one bedroom apartment with my family of four. My parents did not have much money at all, but they never ever had that poor mentality. My clothes may have been hand-me-downs, but I never went hungry and always got everything I needed.
And while my parents were low on money, they were time rich and spent much of that time with us. Definitely better than the other way around!
Yeah, and we can euthanise anyone who doesn't fit some preconceived notion of perfection... oh, that's right - it's already been tried!
Geez, I'm glad you're not in charge.
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