I'm a little overwhelmed at the moment

[lizzie]

This is perfectly normal, except for the exhaustion piece.

A few months ago, I couldn't physically get out of bed in the morning. I went to see a naturopath, who told me to go and get blood tests, especially for Vit D and also told me I had run off adrenalin for too long

i did this too after going thru a series of blood test with the dr only to be told nothing is wrong.

i also run on adrenaline, and your adrenal gland needs vit c to function - also turns out i have leaky gut syndrome and liver needs to be unclogged. i also have a brain that won't "stop" a night - keeps buzzing. the naturopath put me thru a series of tests - inclduing for depression and live blood scanning.

anyhow, i'm now on vit c supplement. went on a 6 week gut clean out and detox. am on a combination of herbs to calm the brain to tolerable levels at night so can sleep ... and have gone from not being able to drag my backside out of bed in the morning to feeling great and refreshed.

next week starts the liver detox.

i'd second a reputable naturopath if the doctor can't help.

 

[Property Meister]

Thanks everyone for the replies.

Just to clarify I don't have a drinking problem or a gambling problem if thats what GG stands for (Gambling God?). I guess the three pieces of advice are:

1. Write a to do list immediately
2. See a doctor and maybe get some anti-depressants
3. Get my wife or a bookkeeper or accountant to handle my BASs

I probably knew all that before I posted but I really just needed some encouragement. I've been through all this before. At one stage I had more bills than I could pay, but I knew I had money coming in to cover it. I could see a light at the end of the tunnel so that helped me through. I've got to the end and the light has either got dimmer or further away and thats what I'm battling. Having had money troubles before my psyche has changed and bills just scare me to the point that I would rather pay for something up straight away than have a 30 day account sent out; weird I know.

What exactly is your business? that may give us insight of what you are going through, and for the record, i have just finished running a business, and it was the hardest one ive done so far, and it took over my life which I was happy to accept

 

[Piston Broke]

1. Write a to do list immediately
2. See a doctor and maybe get some anti-depressants
3. Get my wife or a bookkeeper or accountant to handle my BASs

This is all good (xept anti-deps imo), but I would suggest go back to basics:
What & Why are you doing it?
Why did you start your biz, reafferm your reasons first, then goals and change them if need be.
Do you really want to do it?
If so how can you do it better?
The question really is what about motivation imo and looking from the outside in.

PS Nothing wrong with paying up and running current accounts.
Most biz wish they could too!

 

[Belbo]

As an observer all I can say is that the contributions to this post have been fantastically thoughtful and honestly great advice for anyone under serious pressure running a business. I run one, although I don't own it but I'm expected to run it like I do, so I do hope you'll not disregard what I have to say.

The advice so far in summary might be formulated: Take care of yourself, try to recruit the understanding and assistance of others, and break that mountain down into a series of steps. The last is the most important in some ways: If the mountain becomes a simple stairway in your own mind, then it just takes one step at a time. (And, as Lizzie rightly says, just keep going at those little steps like a demon.)

I'd advocate one more absolutely key thing though, and this takes a bit of time to set up, but it can work for you I think because it sounds to me, Overwhelmed, like you're experiencing cash flow problems (re BAS), admin problems, and the resulting 'unforced errors' that come with all the stress involved there.

You need to create a cash flow report to yourself. It can be as simple as a spreadsheet with two groups - those who you owe money to (creditors, including the ATO) and those who owe you money (debtors). Now put the invoiced date on the left and list each group in order. Keep this updated daily (best done after the morning morning bank reconciliation, which must be the very first task every day in your business). From there a daily business survival plan can evolve, because you can see on one page how you're going to play the situation each day.

Now, calling a supplier to say you plan to pay 30 days late is almost always fine, because they know youre thinking about how to keep 'being a good customer'. Similarly, calling a customer of yours to ask for a quicker payment on a particular invoice than usual is often just as fine, as they'll try to help you first if they know you're planning to return the favour when they need a bit of help with their own cash flow. (I recently sent out such a call and quarter of a million dollars not due for 30 days poured into our bank accounts over a 48-hour period. It offset $100K in immediate payables nicely, and left me with my regular bank float more than intact.)

If there is one single discipline I would impose on any and every small business owner it's to do this thing as the absolute first order of business every single day. It's how I run the small business I manage (we update a single-page 12-week cashflow projection weekly, which tells me everything I need to addresss instantly), and the P&L and Balance Sheet will just take care of themselves (at least, if you know how to price your business services sensibly).

Please also feel free to PM me, Overwhelmed. I'd be more than happy to lend a hand. And you've got nothing to feel embarrassed about, by the way: Our wonderful country is made of and made by good hard-working people just like you.

 

[RumpledElf]

I second everything Lizzie said about breaking things into small chunks.

Prioritise smallest to biggest if you want, write them down somewhere obvious and start crossing them off. Anything done is better than nothing and makes you feel better.

Been there done that almost a decade ago now, not business related at all though, just personal stuff that got on top of me at the time and I let so much day-to-day things slide. Not a fun place to be in.

 

[bluestorm]

I have let maintenace slip (at home and work) to help the cash flow but it's starting to catch up a little. We live in an old house thats a bit small and not very modern. My desk is a disgrace and I'm behind with my BAS statements. I also have a few unfinished projects.

My wife is working one day a week, with difficulty. Transport and childcare make it difficult for her.

Not sure what your situation is, but if your wife works one day a week, could she not help out with things like BAS, and some of those projects I know my dad works and stay at home mum does all the invoices and account in MYOB (maybe 30mins a day).
Any options for some evening, or weekend work for your wife?

And like everyone else has said, break the work up into small chunks, and set milestones for getting those done.

 

[pennyk]

Thanks everyone for the replies.

Just to clarify I don't have a drinking problem or a gambling problem if thats what GG stands for (Gambling God?). I guess the three pieces of advice are:
.

I think GG was a guess at what your "true somersoft identity" was.

I've written a long post on the "anti-depressents" thread, but just wanted to add a couple of things here.
I've actually found the ATO surprisingly understanding and willing to delay payments/ submissions, particularly if they see that you have been paying consistently in the past. When my business failed, I wrote to them after struggling for months to get payments made. They ended up repaying all the interest payments they had charged over the previous 3 years. and they have given an extension to submitting our tax returns because of my health situation.

as others have said, break down tasks into smaller chunks and do a little at a time. often we dont start things because we think we cant finish them... but if you do a little a day, you can get things done quicker. and start with the smallest tasks first so that you achieve them. Also, pay the smallest bills/debts first, to get them out of the way.
When I write a to-do list, I always add a couple of things that I've already done...... that way I can cross them off the list and it tricks my mind into thinking I'm being productive, and I find productivity breeds productivity.

and only get your wife to help with BAS if she's good with numbers and detailed and accurate..... when I was doing our BAS, it significantly added to everyones stress levels (including mine), cause I was none of those things. (the business was primarily my venture, not my husbands... and he also wasnt much good at detailed accounts, although better than me!)

I hope it all works out for you...

 

[willair]

Thanks everyone for the replies.

Just to clarify I don't have a drinking problem or a gambling problem if thats what GG stands for (Gambling God?). I guess the three pieces of advice are:
.

Sorry about the"GG",, i just thought you may have been a past long time poster that was going through the same problems that everyone now faces in any small business,all problems are sent to test you,just like cutting down a very large tree,and you only have a small axe,and the only way is one branch at a time..good luck..

 

[Overwhelmed]

Im off to see the doctor for a check up this morning. If I'm institutionalised then this may be my last post for a while, otherwise I'll let ya'll know how it goes.

 

[lizzie]

haha - the humour and the smilie face are good to see. and a great start. let us know how you get on.

 

[Overwhelmed]

Ok, I've seen the doc. She didn't recommend anti-depressants but suggested counselling. Another doc reccomended this site as a self counselling service: http://moodgym.anu.edu.au
After reading all your posts I suspected this I didn't have depression.
I've also been short of breath lately when I do anything too physical. This is not a big problem for me as most of my work is pretty easy. It's just running, etc. Anything that would get most people puffed out in 10 minutes, I can only last 1 minute. I think this might be related to a previous lung problem. The doc couldn't hear any probs with the stethoscope, and my blood pressure tests normal. Last time my blood pressure got tested the nurse said, "gee thats low." I think the stress has bought it up to normal levels. Not sure if thats good or bad. So anyway, the doc has sent me off to get some xrays and a blood test for my thyroid. Maybe I just need some exercise for my lungs.

 

[Monopoly]

Im off to see the doctor for a check up this morning. If I'm institutionalised then this may be my last post for a while, otherwise I'll let ya'll know how it goes.

Overwhelmed, though you may feel like you will be, I highly doubt you are a candidate for "institutionalisation"!! Well, not yet anyways....

I've been away for a few days working on a major renovation/building reconstruction for one of our beachside properties and as such have had my head buried in drawings, measurements blah blah blah, but your thread was brought to my attention by a few concerned somersoftians!! SEE there are people who care about you, even ones you don't know or have ever met!!

Feel free to PM me if you want a brief chat, I am (albeit retired) a qualified psychologist and can help you, even letting you know what (if needed) medication would be best and which to steer away from. However from what I've read of your posts, I don't believe anti-depressants are needed (again) "yet" and may not be at all necessary. But without knowing or getting "the full picture" often only ever revealed over prolongef visits to a professional that the true underlying issues are identified. It may well be that "money" in itself is not the problem, but as with most things in life, is merely the trigger.

Going to the GP is perhaps the best thing, and shows that you "want" to make a change and care enough about yourself to go visit one. You'd be surprised how many people who get so down that they don't even take this monumental step of seeking help, even from their GP.

I wish you well (and soon).


Added later (after reading the OP's last post):
Overwhelmed, I'm pleased to learn you don't have depression, that is great news.
Please do keep us posted and hopefully let us know you are well on your way to better health soon.

 

[Cdro]

Thanks everyone for the replies.

I guess the three pieces of advice are:

1. Write a to do list immediately
2. See a doctor and maybe get some anti-depressants
3. Get my wife or a bookkeeper or accountant to handle my BASs

Hi overwhelmed, I notice that in a later post, you said you have now gone for a checkup. Well done! You can tick the first thing off the list.

How are you going on the other 2 things? What deadline have you given yourself?

I won't give advice (seems like there's a lot already!) but wanted to say thanks for being brave and sharing a bit of your life with us. It reminds me that it's ok not to be perfect all the time. I'm also a bit inspired by your attitude to doing something about it - we all have problems, but not all of us take active steps to fix them. You are not only taking the steps, but doing it against a tide of overwhelming emotions. I just love it when people spit in the face of fear. I can see from this thread that there is a huge amount of support for you so hang in there, we're all cheering you on from the sidelines!

 

[jaycee]

Hi overwhelmed, I notice that in a later post, you said you have now gone for a checkup. Well done! You can tick the first thing off the list.

How are you going on the other 2 things? What deadline have you given yourself?

I won't give advice (seems like there's a lot already!) but wanted to say thanks for being brave and sharing a bit of your life with us. It reminds me that it's ok not to be perfect all the time. I'm also a bit inspired by your attitude to doing something about it - we all have problems, but not all of us take active steps to fix them. You are not only taking the steps, but doing it against a tide of overwhelming emotions. I just love it when people spit in the face of fear. I can see from this thread that there is a huge amount of support for you so hang in there, we're all cheering you on from the sidelines!

(Definitely) couldn't have siad it better myself

 

[Belbo]

+1 to that, and very best.

 

[lizzie]

amon to that!

we're all supporting you - can understand where you are and the potential of where you can be.

love and hugs

 

[Overwhelmed]

Xray showed that everything is normal. It appears that I just have weak lungs. Still waiting on blood tests but not expecting anything.

 

[virgo]

Overwhelmed?

Hi Overwhelmed

Thought i'll share this story with you...

A few years ago (dunno why...but it seems to hit men in their 40s!), my hubby was extremely stressed at work...there was a particular week which was so bad he sought help at the doctor...the doctor referred him to a psychiatrist who promptly diagnosed maniac depression. He started counselling sessions and drugs within a week...3 weeks later, blood test came back....DENGUE FEVER!

We never did get a refund from those expensive sessions and drugs...


Morale of the story: always seek a second opinion!!!!

 

[Aaron Sice]

Ok, I've seen the doc. She didn't recommend anti-depressants but suggested counselling. Another doc reccomended this site as a self counselling service: http://moodgym.anu.edu.au
After reading all your posts I suspected this I didn't have depression.
I've also been short of breath lately when I do anything too physical. This is not a big problem for me as most of my work is pretty easy. It's just running, etc. Anything that would get most people puffed out in 10 minutes, I can only last 1 minute. I think this might be related to a previous lung problem. The doc couldn't hear any probs with the stethoscope, and my blood pressure tests normal. Last time my blood pressure got tested the nurse said, "gee thats low." I think the stress has bought it up to normal levels. Not sure if thats good or bad. So anyway, the doc has sent me off to get some xrays and a blood test for my thyroid. Maybe I just need some exercise for my lungs.

i had time with a psychologist, was only a few sessions but helps you clear your headspace and re-align your goals.

good luck mate - my offer still stands.

 

[Gordon Gekko]

Is this GG?

No, I'm GG, assuming you mean me, which would be a fair call. All is well in my life, new job, all our kids are well, including our little "heartkid"

GG