# JOKE: The glass

#### Lissy

Joke

There's a glass filled halfway with water.

The pessimist says - the glass is half empty.

The optimist says - the glass is half full.

The quantity surveyor says - someone over capitalised on this glass, they should have bought a smaller one, but we can still depreciate its value.

#### DB_Bear

The engineer comes along and says that the vessel was not built correctly for its obvious purpose.

DB_Bear

PS: Mr Bear IS an engineer.

#### Peter_Tersteeg

Mr Bear thinks the glass is currently holding a suitable amount of water. Engineers like to err on the side of caution and over engineer when he can.

Mr Bear would also like to publically declare his eternal love and affection for Mrs Bear.

#### Sim

Awwwww... ain't that sweet ?

#### asy

moderator puts curtains up around this room.....

asy

#### Lissy

I had a conversation on this subject last night.
My point was that this question of half full or half empty is essentially flawed, in that the answer depends on what led to the glass of water being in that state in the first place.
If, for example, I am in the process of pouring water into the glass, then I would definitely say that the glass if half full, as I am in the process of filling it.
If, however, I am in the process of drinking the water, I would then say that it is half empty, as I am in the process of emptying it.
Sometimes it worries me, the things that my brain finds of interest....

#### asy

Schroedinger's cat (Long and rambly, sorry)

Yeah, Lissy, I know what you mean!!

I was discussing Schroedinger's cat with a friend last night...

What a dilemma.

I find these theories of Quantum mechanics and psychological conundra fascinating.

Here it is for you to have a look at:

In the Shroedinger Cat Paradox, a cat is penned up in a steel box, along with a diabolical device that consists of a Geiger counter containing a tiny bit of radioactive material, an amount so small that perhaps within an hour one atom decays, but with equal probability will not decay.

If an atom does decay, the counter tube discharges, triggers a hammer which shatters a small flask of hydrocyanic acid, and kills the cat.

After an hour, is the cat alive or dead? Until the box is opened ‑‑ thereby destroying the experiment altogether ‑‑ the wretched cat exists in the unenviable state of being both alive and dead.

Shroedinger meant his paradox to be a sort of absurd thought experiment to show that at some level quantum mechanics must fail, that it couldn't apply to the macroscopic world.

Here are some sites you might want to look at:

http://www.urma.org/2001/ohio/Quantumcat.htm

There is a funny, but mostly correct analysis on this site: http://pub173.ezboard.com/fevespoetryoasisfrm28.showMessage?topicID=132.topic]

there is also an interesting discussion on this site: http://www.notegoat.com/papers/astro5.html

The problems that Einstein had with quantum mechanics is that he used the commonsense notion that a particle has a definite history. And that a particle has a definite location. But, it must be taken into account that a particle has an infinite set of histories. A famous thought experiment called Shroedinger's cat helps to illustrate this concept. Let's say that a cat is placed in a sealed box and a gun is pointed at it. The gun will only go off if a radioactive nucleus decays. There is exactly a 50% chance of this happening. Later on, before the box is opened, there are two possibilities of what happened to the cat: the gun did not go off, and the cat is alive, or the gun did go off, and the cat is dead. Before the box is opened, the cat is both alive and dead at the same time. The cat has two separate histories.

Hmmm....
Can we have separate histories?

Does everything have to be based on the history of the cat in the perspective of the cat?

This begs the question, is history the same depending on the perspective of the historian? We have seen evidence of the value of personal experience in hisoric analyses in many times, for example the history of war. Books written by both sides of the war tend to shed different light on different aspects and can affect the final view of the history being written.

Hmmm...

(Don't anyone ask me if I get bored...)

Thanks Lissy for starting this thread, it is interesting!!

asy

#### Sunstone

Dear Asy,

Can remember reading "What is history?" by Carr many years ago.

History is usually always written from one side. It is always the victor and therefore is not necessarily a correct history.

Especially we get the case of history that is then written from history books that were all written from the victory side and therefore become even more one-sided.

It is at this point in time that we need other underground stories to come out such as the one that brought the movie "Braveheart" to fruitition.

....Comes down to what is really history????

(By the way good out of the box topic Asy. :---))

Cheers,

Sunstone.

#### Lissy

I really have to stop reading this forum so early in the morning....

#### JamesGG

Here's another one for ya's all...

Which came first, the chicken or the egg???

We spent a whole English double arguing over that one... and i still say it's the egg - I'll post why later on sometime...

Cheers,
James.

#### asy

Is it because Dinosaurs were laying eggs long before there were chickens??

asy

#### Simon

The Egg.

At some point in evolution of a chicken there was a chick hatched which was chicken enough to be called the first chicken. This came out of an egg born from a parent who was not quite chicken.

Hows that for early on a Sat morning.

#### paulzag

Profound

1) Ipso facto Asy has way too much time on her hands
2) prima facie Asy has way too much time on her hands

Oh and from an investors perspective the cat is dead. Until proven otherwise.

Wrappers may disagree.

#### geoffw

On the subject of jokes...

Recently a "Husband Shopping Center" opened in Dublin, where women could go to choose a husband from among many men.

It was laid out in five floors, with the men increasing in positive Attributes as you ascended up the floors. The only rule was, once you opened the door To any floor, you must choose a man from that floor, and if you went up a floor, you couldn't go back down except to leave the place never to return.

A couple of girlfriends go to the Husband Shopping Centre to find men.

FIRST FLOOR The door had a sign saying "These men have jobs and love kids."

The women read the sign and say, "Well, that's better than not having jobs, or not loving kids, but I wonder what's further up?"

So up they go.........

SECOND FLOOR The door had a sign saying "These men have high paying jobs, love kids, are excellent lovers and are extremely good looking."

Hmmm, say the girls. But, I wonder what's further up?

So up they go.........

THIRD FLOOR The door had a sign saying "These men have high paying jobs, are excellent lovers and are extremely good looking, love kids and help with the housework.

Wow! say the women. Very tempting, BUT, there's more further up!

And up they go.......

FOURTH FLOOR

The door had a sign saying "These men have high paying jobs, love kids, are excellent lovers and are extremely good looking, help with the housework, and have a strong romantic streak."

Oh, mercy me. But just think! What must be awaiting us further on!

So up to the fifth floor they go..........

FIFTH FLOOR

The sign on that door said, "This floor is empty and exists only to prove that women are impossible to please. "

#### geoffw

A Woman's 5 Secrets to a Great Relationship

1. It is important to find a man who works around the house, occasionally cooks and cleans and who has a job.

2. It is important to find a man who makes you laugh.

3. It is important to find a man who is dependable and doesn't lie.

4. It is important to find a man who's good in bed and who loves to have sex with you.

5. It is important that these four men never meet.

#### Steve Navra

The start of this post was unBEARable, and now this:

Which came first, the chicken or the egg???

Definitely the egg;
chickens don't lay eggs! (Ahem, hens do)

Steve

#### tonyd

Re: Profound

Originally posted by paulzag

Oh and from an investors perspective the cat is dead. Until proven otherwise.

Wrappers may disagree.

Actually, the cat's state will depend on the lease agreement.

No pets allowed -> cat (and tenant) dead

When the property is vacant, the cat will be dead after 4 days.

Schroedinger's goldfish is a much more interesting test for any theory of Investment Mechanics, since lease agreement effects are negligible.
In this instance there is a 83% chance that the goldfish will be dead, indicating that our universe is biased towards dead goldfish.

cheers, Tony
(my first post on the new forum!)

#### Sim

Re: Re: Profound

Originally posted by tonyd
In this instance there is a 83% chance that the goldfish will be dead, indicating that our universe is biased towards dead goldfish.

I have lots of empirical evidence to support this theorem. I would like to add a corollary that the likelihood that said goldfish will remain alive is inversely proportional to the amount of effort expended in attempting to keep them so.

#### Steve Navra

Hmmmmmmmm,

It is a bit like looking for a black cat in a dark room;
especially if there is no cat!

Steve

#### Mr. Fabulous

The cat has only one reality. It is either alive or dead. It cannot be both. There ARE however, two possibilities. It could be alive or it could be dead. It's that simple. To take it any further than that, would make you a... bah-bow. Thought I was gonna say it didn't ya?

Mark
'no hat, some cattle'

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