well, I kind of got scared off giving updates (and also reading anything related to preventing or healing cancer) by one of our forum members, who was quite abusive in another thread..... and whom I think may have recently returned under another name. But someone asked me to, so I will.
But if I cope any cr*p from this loony, or have anyone telling me that chemo is killing me, then I'll only do PM updates on request...
Alot has happened since I did my last update... so this is a long one.
Looking back, I last updated when I started my 2nd line of chemo. I have to say that it was very easy. I had no nausea, minimal tiredness and no other negative symptoms from the chemo. I travelled to Germany just before my final round of chemo in Sept. On the way, I began to get some severe hip pain... it wasnt constant, but when it came, it was unbearable. Fortunately, the company I work for make wheelchairs, so I was able to get around. I came home, had final chemo and had my scans. They were all clear, and there was no sign of what might have been causing the pain, so it didnt seem to be cancer related.
But, over the next couple of months, it got worse. So, I went early for my next scans and also booked in for an MRI. By this stage, I was unable to walk further than from one room to another at home. I was using a wheelchair almost constantly and I was in lots of pain. (but I was still travelling for work!! )
I was also on painkillers, which were causing me to get blocked up.
My hubby had to take me to my oncology appt (usually I went alone). the MRI showed up a tumor on my spine, blocking the sacral nerves. I was kind of relieved to know what was going on. There was also a slight growth in the lungs, which was causing my lungs to collapse (I knew there was because I'd started coughing/wheezing again). I guess I was downplaying the pain to the doctors.... but with hubby there, he was more honest! As a result, I was admitted to hospital that day, so they could get the pain and poo under control (constipation is not only caused by painkillers, but it stops them from working, so its a nasty cycle). I was booked in for radiation to the sacrum and since they were doing that, they decided to give the lungs a burst as well. My pain was so bad that I couldnt lie down on the radiation table without crying and screaming, so they had to dose me to the eyeballs with some very nice drugs which gave me a "lucy in the sky with diamonds" experience for several hours each day..... I was still working from m hospital bed, and I was a bit worried about what I might have said during one of my out of body experiences! I ended up being in hospital for 10 days.
oh, and did I mention that this was all in the midst of selling our home, buying a new PPOR and moving?!! I came home from hospital on Thursday evening and moved the following Tuesday... and you might remember we had the removalist from hell!!
But the combo of the radiation and pain control made a big difference, particularly with the pain and the coughing, although I was still fairly immobile. (and I had a very impressive circle of "sunburn", which has only just gone away.) My oncologist wanted to also blast it with some more chemo. So, I started chemo again in January, and am doing my 3rd round of third line chemo this week. Again, I'm having almost no side effects from it, except for a HUGE reduction in pain and increase in mobility. Its been quite amazing. I still need the wheelchair for longer distances, but I'm able to walk about 5x as far as I could before I started. (which is why I get so cranky when people start talking about chemo killing people.. my experience has been nothing but positive)
I'm still working fulltime, which I think is one of my best "treatments". I felt kind of depressed and teary over christmas, when I had 2 weeks holidays.... dwelling on the negative and scary stuff. As soon as I went back to work and had something else to think about, I felt much better. I have far too much to do and achieve to let this cancer get the better of me, and I definitely want to get on a plane again soon. its been far too long between flights!! My managers have been incredibly supportive and kind, and they just treat me like normal. Although one of them wrote something very touching in his end of year wrap up. Its so unlike him that he had me blubbering! (which is unlike me!! )
Given where I'm at, I feel like I'm doing remarkably well emotionally. I dont feel like I'm blocking emotions, but I dont let them take control either. I generally feel fairly relaxed about it all. (unlike moving house, which was very stressful!) . sleeping and eating just fine. hubby also seems more relaxed. He was amazing when I was in hospital. If roles had been reversed, I dont think I would have coped so well......managing selling, buying, last weeks of school, christmas planning, moving out/ packing, moving in/ unpacking, washing my clothes etc..... he's been a tower of strength and practical support. thanks darling!!
So, thats me..... thanks to those of you who have asked how I'm doing. I think I'm doing well, but taking it one day at a time for now!
But if I cope any cr*p from this loony, or have anyone telling me that chemo is killing me, then I'll only do PM updates on request...
Alot has happened since I did my last update... so this is a long one.
Looking back, I last updated when I started my 2nd line of chemo. I have to say that it was very easy. I had no nausea, minimal tiredness and no other negative symptoms from the chemo. I travelled to Germany just before my final round of chemo in Sept. On the way, I began to get some severe hip pain... it wasnt constant, but when it came, it was unbearable. Fortunately, the company I work for make wheelchairs, so I was able to get around. I came home, had final chemo and had my scans. They were all clear, and there was no sign of what might have been causing the pain, so it didnt seem to be cancer related.
But, over the next couple of months, it got worse. So, I went early for my next scans and also booked in for an MRI. By this stage, I was unable to walk further than from one room to another at home. I was using a wheelchair almost constantly and I was in lots of pain. (but I was still travelling for work!! )
I was also on painkillers, which were causing me to get blocked up.
My hubby had to take me to my oncology appt (usually I went alone). the MRI showed up a tumor on my spine, blocking the sacral nerves. I was kind of relieved to know what was going on. There was also a slight growth in the lungs, which was causing my lungs to collapse (I knew there was because I'd started coughing/wheezing again). I guess I was downplaying the pain to the doctors.... but with hubby there, he was more honest! As a result, I was admitted to hospital that day, so they could get the pain and poo under control (constipation is not only caused by painkillers, but it stops them from working, so its a nasty cycle). I was booked in for radiation to the sacrum and since they were doing that, they decided to give the lungs a burst as well. My pain was so bad that I couldnt lie down on the radiation table without crying and screaming, so they had to dose me to the eyeballs with some very nice drugs which gave me a "lucy in the sky with diamonds" experience for several hours each day..... I was still working from m hospital bed, and I was a bit worried about what I might have said during one of my out of body experiences! I ended up being in hospital for 10 days.
oh, and did I mention that this was all in the midst of selling our home, buying a new PPOR and moving?!! I came home from hospital on Thursday evening and moved the following Tuesday... and you might remember we had the removalist from hell!!
But the combo of the radiation and pain control made a big difference, particularly with the pain and the coughing, although I was still fairly immobile. (and I had a very impressive circle of "sunburn", which has only just gone away.) My oncologist wanted to also blast it with some more chemo. So, I started chemo again in January, and am doing my 3rd round of third line chemo this week. Again, I'm having almost no side effects from it, except for a HUGE reduction in pain and increase in mobility. Its been quite amazing. I still need the wheelchair for longer distances, but I'm able to walk about 5x as far as I could before I started. (which is why I get so cranky when people start talking about chemo killing people.. my experience has been nothing but positive)
I'm still working fulltime, which I think is one of my best "treatments". I felt kind of depressed and teary over christmas, when I had 2 weeks holidays.... dwelling on the negative and scary stuff. As soon as I went back to work and had something else to think about, I felt much better. I have far too much to do and achieve to let this cancer get the better of me, and I definitely want to get on a plane again soon. its been far too long between flights!! My managers have been incredibly supportive and kind, and they just treat me like normal. Although one of them wrote something very touching in his end of year wrap up. Its so unlike him that he had me blubbering! (which is unlike me!! )
Given where I'm at, I feel like I'm doing remarkably well emotionally. I dont feel like I'm blocking emotions, but I dont let them take control either. I generally feel fairly relaxed about it all. (unlike moving house, which was very stressful!) . sleeping and eating just fine. hubby also seems more relaxed. He was amazing when I was in hospital. If roles had been reversed, I dont think I would have coped so well......managing selling, buying, last weeks of school, christmas planning, moving out/ packing, moving in/ unpacking, washing my clothes etc..... he's been a tower of strength and practical support. thanks darling!!
So, thats me..... thanks to those of you who have asked how I'm doing. I think I'm doing well, but taking it one day at a time for now!