Yeh sorry I do overcomplicate things.
The daily feed of misleading news does not help. I can't blame you.
I see you are in Perth and it is one city where low-status bargains are starting to emerge. For barely $250,000 you can get a rentable old house on a development sized block in places like Kenwick, Kwinana, Parmelia, Armadale. Some of the deals are quite compelling.....situations where you can retain the existing home and build at the back. That's unbeatable!
Yes, people will snigger when you buy these cheapies. You will spend a few weekends painting and clearing gardens. You may even have a few bad tenants. But you'll be sitting pretty in a few years while the rest of the crowd followers are bemoaning the poor state of the world economy and the fact that their overpriced inner-city junk hasn't gone up in price.
Good luck. Stay positive - the world isn't about to end anytime soon.