18 yr old guy, 14 yr old girl

[INVSTOR]

What a heartwarming story.

What if they did end up having the kids, and like a lot of young single parents, were not able to do a good job raising them? There are enough degenerates out there made that way by parents who were not ready to raise them.

That reminds me of a couple of people I went to school with. The girl was 15, the guy was 18. She ended up getting pregnant, he was bashing her and they were both abusing drugs and alcohol. They split up and the grandparents brought up the daughter. I got an update of the people I went to school with 3 years ago. The guy has Hep C, he's probably deceased now, and the girl became a grandma at the age of 38. The great-grandparents are helping bring up the child as the boyfriend didn't stick around.

I feel it's my duty to protect my children so there is no way I would allow my children to date people who are old enough to drink alcohol and go to night clubs while they are still studying at school. Who needs all the complexity of love at such a young age? Be a kid for as long as you can IMO!

 

[natmarie73]

Sure that's your call but I think lots of people would be very uncomfortable with it.

Uncomfortable with what exactly? I just stated that I wouldn't like my 14 year old daughter to have an 18 year old boyfriend - are you saying that most people would be comfortable with their 14 yo daughters having older boyfriends? Some may well be I suppose, and I wonder if those single parent families have a higher incidence of young daughters going out of control and coming home pregnant than those who belong to a strong family unit. FWIW my school friends both had mum and dad at home, and were on the pill as well.

It all comes down to the morals you instill in your children to some extent, and the type of person they are to another.

And again, whose business is it apart from the family concerned?

 

[natmarie73]

That reminds me of a couple of people I went to school with. The girl was 15, the guy was 18. She ended up getting pregnant, he was bashing her and they were both abusing drugs and alcohol. They split up and the grandparents brought up the daughter. I got an update of the people I went to school with 3 years ago. The guy has Hep C, he's probably deceased now, and the girl became a grandma at the age of 38. The great-grandparents are helping bring up the child as the boyfriend didn't stick around.

I feel it's my duty to protect my children so there is no way I would allow my children to date people who are old enough to drink alcohol and go to night clubs while they are still studying at school. Who needs all the complexity of love at such a young age? Be a kid for as long as you can IMO!

All too common a story unfortunately.

 

[Ideo]

Uncomfortable with what exactly? I just stated that I wouldn't like my 14 year old daughter to have an 18 year old boyfriend - are you saying that most people would be comfortable with their 14 yo daughters having older boyfriends? Some may well be I suppose, and I wonder if those single parent families have a higher incidence of young daughters going out of control and coming home pregnant than those who belong to a strong family unit. FWIW my school friends both had mum and dad at home, and were on the pill as well.

It all comes down to the morals you instill in your children to some extent, and the type of person they are to another.

And again, whose business is it apart from the family concerned?

Also comes down to the age of consent which is a social construct. There would be nothing illegal about the above in Spain where the age of consent is 14. Here it would be.

The AoC is set by each individual state or country. Personally, I think Australia got it right at 16, but as with every black and white law to do with aspects of social morality regarding interactions between people, there will be people who fall outside of it. But that is just how it is.

 

[Shaneelastic]

a very contoversial issue as such.

 

[kathryn d]

Also comes down to the age of consent which is a social construct. There would be nothing illegal about the above in Spain where the age of consent is 14. Here it would be.

The AoC is set by each individual state or country. Personally, I think Australia got it right at 16, but as with every black and white law to do with aspects of social morality regarding interactions between people, there will be people who fall outside of it. But that is just how it is.

They increased it to 16 (from 14) in 2008 in canada.

 

[Ausprop]

it doesn't really matter because GPs can sign off on underage consent if they feel the child is of a mature state of mind. hence when 13 year olds present themselves as pregnant with a 20 year old boyfriend it doesn't become an automatic criminal charge. I found this quite surprising.

 

[Aaron_C]

it doesn't really matter because GPs can sign off on underage consent if they feel the child is of a mature state of mind. hence when 13 year olds present themselves as pregnant with a 20 year old boyfriend it doesn't become an automatic criminal charge. I found this quite surprising.

I don't think doctors can make what is unlawful, lawful. That would be arbitrary and undermine the rule of law.

 

[kathryn d]

I don't think doctors can make what is unlawful, lawful. That would be arbitrary and undermine the rule of law.

Do you want a child's parent imprisoned...
Especially if it consentual.

 

[Ausprop]

I always thought that too - I can't go into detail for a whole host of reasons but I can assure you it is absolutely what occurs. Personally I found it a bit disturbing.

 

[Ausprop]

I should add that I don't know if it waivers the crime, but there is no compulsion to report it

 

[Aaron_C]

Do you want a child's parent imprisoned...
Especially if it consentual.

That's the whole point of the law, kathryn. They cannot provide true consent because of their age. This is why minors can't enter contracts.

 

[kathryn d]

That's the whole point of the law, kathryn. They cannot provide true consent because of their age. This is why minors can't enter contracts.

Kids can get married, with parental consent.

It's a sad case, either way...but I wouldn't want the baby's father imprisoned, for this reason.
Imagine the guilt this young girl, and the baby would feel.

Now rape, that is a different story.

 

[weg]

kathryn, how many of the 'adult' boyfriends of the 13 and 14yo mothers stick around anyway??

Does an adult man that gets a child pregnant have any integrity to begin with, that you should feel sorry for him??

That's it Aaron, 13 and 14yo's might appear mature but are they mature enough to make adult like decisions?

Obviously we have differing opinions here, but I think 13/14yo are still children and should be protected from what imo are adult predators.

 

[Shaneelastic]

I find it disturbing that a an 18 yr old first year university student, or even a worker is going out with a year 9 girl. cant they find girls their own age, or over 16 at least.

 

[kathryn d]

kathryn, how many of the 'adult' boyfriends of the 13 and 14yo mothers stick around anyway??

Does an adult man that gets a child pregnant have any integrity to begin with, that you should feel sorry for him??

That's it Aaron, 13 and 14yo's might appear mature but are they mature enough to make adult like decisions?

Obviously we have differing opinions here, but I think 13/14yo are still children and should be protected from what imo are adult predators.

I'm not suggesting that you are wrong.
Few relationships last....but that seems to be with all age groups.

A good friend of mine has been with her husband (she was 14, he 18) until they divorced a couple of years ago. They were together 36 years (she is my age)



If Elvis Pressley and Priscilla were together now (she was 14, when they started dating ) they would consider him a paedophile.


Consent can't be given when a woman is drunk, in some places, so do we charge all the men with rape?

Many times, these adult males, are really just old teenagers

Growing up in different times, in different areas, will shape your opinion differently.
I just don't have a problem with it, in theory.
They just don't need to get pregnant !
But us hillbillies are like that ....

 

[weg]

Growing up in different times, in different areas, will shape your opinion differently.

... possibly different parents too.

I was not allowed to have a boyfriend at 14, period.

 

[Fifth]

do you have a link to the nine year old young girl,and the 18 year old man?

The girl is in year 9, not 9 years old. That would be a very different discussion...

 

[willair]

The girl is in year 9, not 9 years old. That would be a very different discussion...

Sorry about that,iv'e always had a problem with numbers,,Grade 9- or nine year old there are unwritten laws that are out there,that if broken then you know what happens next ..

 

[kathryn d]

... possibly different parents too.

I was not allowed to have a boyfriend at 14, period.

Possibly..and different country.
Maybe everyone knowing each other too. Parents knowing the other families..not as friends, but as village residents.
Very few new people moving in and out.
I had a great childhood...