We stil have our bloody housing dilemma,help !

[random]

Hey people.
A few mths back we tried to work this one out here but best with a fresh thread now , we're still nowhere.
For anyone that might remember sorry to re run but maybe new people are looking too so.
We're stuck . We've been renting nearly 3 yrs, we just can't find a house. We have our investment places an hr away , but we're stuck here renting.
We just want small ac's and yep it's in the Great Ocean Rd area so it's too dear for us. But we're established here now , we really like it and our daughters settled into school.
We've had a few places in town pop up suburban , 1/4 ac blocks . We just can't take to the idea though , we all really just want some small ac a bit out of town. So they've all hit a wall , again !
There was an investment one 20 mins in , we could've gone there, finished that off and if we still wanted, move back over to the coast in a yr or two but that's fallen through too. Having the stupidest run I have EVER seen.

So just this last week , I found another one in 25 mins . It's a beauty and 1/2 the price off out here on the coast so we could afford it.
It's closer to the bigger main town we shop at so that's good , it's basically the same distance as from here is to our main living town now , just in a different direction but it is away from my daughters school friend circle and the smaller, our everyday living spot.
People we know and my daughters friends , don't really have anything to do with that area. My daughters only 9, this new place is also out of town and most of the kids from that spot go to a different school. She loves this new place but we're worried she'll be out of her circles realm and might have trouble meeting new friends there because of the different schools , and the neighbours are spread out on small acreage, bush in between , it's all pretty private .

Dunno , we all love the place and it's doable but we've got the daughter issue though . That might work out just fine , maybe she meets new kids locally one way or another no problem,as well as has her school stuff but then again .
I have thought of one thing first of all in just trying to atleast find out if there's actually any kids over there . The only way we can think of is to go over and knock on a few doors .

Dunno dunno , what do ya think of it all !

Cheers

 

[skater]

How far away are you talking? It sounds to me like it might only be half an hour. You just have to be flexible and occasionally take them to see the old friends as well as have them over at your place. It's really not that hard.

We moved several times with the kids in tow. Kids make friends easily and with today's technology they can keep in touch with the old ones easily enough.

 

[kathryn d]

When my daughter was 6 we moved.About 1/2 away, but it was a different school. She did the sleepovers with her best friend, and it slowly fizzled out as each had to find a new best friend.
Kids adjust.

 

[Indifference]

Maybe I'm missing something here, but to me it sounds like:

"I'm not happy renting, I want acreage in same area but can't afford it, don't want to downsize and live in town, don't want to leave area..."

Mmm, something has to give. I only see 3 options:

1. Keep renting & hope something comes up in local area within your budget.
2. Reel in your expectations if local area is too expensive.
3. Look further afield and accept your lot in life.

Apologies if I have misinterpreted the situation, but it sounds like you want to 'live beyond your current means'.... Renting is not the end of the world if you are happy to stay put. What value do you put on your current lifestyle?

As for moving with kids, we have lived in 3 different states in Aus and now living in the US... My son has his new best mate sleeping over tonight... kids adapt. Just like us adults.

 

[random]

Hey guys .
Yeah I know it sounds like that but there is a couple of things. We sold our 7 ac place and have been back in town nearly 3yrs, hate it, plus we only have one kid. Another stays with us on and off only , so we're a bit conchy about her friend situation on acreage. Maybe she'll be on her own too much or something but she absolutely loves small acreage living , we all do, she's 91/2.
It's a funny thing though, she's really popular at school but she's also very independent and loves the w/end breaks, often just the three of us because we've been about that same distance from her mates even here anyway. She does have a lot of sleepovers here but mostly w/ends are just us for now , not many kids her age where we are right now.
Thinking maybe we should make sure we get back over that way and a bit closer because of that but where as this place we like is still about this same distance.
Maybe we're worrying too much , I dunno. Spose these things work themselves out once they get established.

See we've lived in 3 states too , she was born across the country , so we've been trying to stabilize life for her as much as poss with the one school, area and batch of friends since we settled here , nearly 5 yrs . 2 of that was on our 7 ac place and the rest wasted renting this joint in town.

Wrapped I've heard from you guys anyway , especially being parents and movers yourselves, thanks for the input .

Cheers

 

[Lil Skater]

Dude, she's 9..

When I was that age we moved from Wollongong to Sydney and at 11 or so we moved a further 30-45min away, no biggie, I always found friends.

She's still in school and surrounded by people, when you're that age it's not hard to meet people and forget others.

I'm struggling to find friends at the moment, but that's because I no longer go to school, i've shifted to another state and I work in a corporate environment where most of my colleges are in their mid to late 30s

It's only half an hour away, your child could keep going to the same school and everything could remain the same, it's no big deal.

Or as the others have said, keep renting or learn to live within your means.

 

[random]

On ya Skater thanks for that.

Sounds like everyone thinks we're worrying too much , that's good maybe we should just buy this place and to hell with it hey , it is a beauty and 1/2 the price.

 

[Luv2Travel]

I think if it ticks all your boxes except for just the issue with your daughter and her friends, then definately proceed. I changed schools a few times when I was in primary school, and sure, I hated my parents for it at the time, but I soon made new friends. It's what kids do, in fact I think it's probably a good thing for her.

 

[wylie]

I agree with Biggles. If the main problem is your daughter's ability to find new friends, I think at nine and a half, she has a couple of years of primary school to make friends, who may continue on to high school with her.

I know others who have said changing schools in the high school years is harder as firm friendships are forming during those years. I suppose each child is different.

When we moved suburbs (older boys were in grade 2 and kindy and changed schools) I took way longer to find new friends that the kids did.

If this move will be one that will last your daughter through the high school years, then maybe go for it, especially if everything else is "right".

 

[Macca]

If you intend to stay there for 7-10 years then it is her last move while at school.

It is more important that she lives in a happy household, if you are both unhappy in town this will flow through to her, Mum and Dad need to enjoy life as well.

We are not here to be martyrs for our children, we have just as much right to do what we want for us as well as providing a safe, happy and secure place for our kids. It is not good to be shaping your lives to suit her, that is too much responsibility for a little girl to be making adult decisions, that is your job, let her be a kid and have fun.

Take her to the new place and simply say, "we like it here" and if she says "I do too" then GO FOR IT

 

[weg]

The only time I'd seriously consider the children's friendship groups are between ages 13 to 18. I would however consider the school they go to now.

Kids aged 9 are still developing and learning how to navigate around friendship groups, and moving schools would be an extension of this. If anything she could learn even more advanced social skills if she's social like you say. Also a best friend at 9 is rarely still a best friend at 13. It's good to encourage lots of different friendships anyway.

What I wouldn't go doing is making negative references or giving out bad vibes on the experience of making new friends or going to a new school. If she picks up on that then she'll have concerns because if the parents are worried there must be a problem/concern. It's all good .

 

[kathryn d]

The only time I'd seriously consider the children's friendship groups are between ages 13 to 18. I would however consider the school they go to now.

Kids aged 9 are still developing and learning how to navigate around friendship groups, and moving schools would be an extension of this. If anything she could learn even more advanced social skills if she's social like you say. Also a best friend at 9 is rarely still a best friend at 13. It's good to encourage lots of different friendships anyway.

What I wouldn't go doing is making negative references or giving out bad vibes on the experience of making new friends or going to a new school. If she picks up on that then she'll have concerns because if the parents are worried there must be a problem/concern. It's all good .

I wanted to move when the youngest 2 were in high school. One child didn't mind, but it really bothered the older one.We delayed it for about 18 months.
His friends lived close by, even though he didn't need to change schools.
I do not regret the decision.

 

[our obsession]

Sounds fantastic Random, but I am biased, biased for wider open spaces, anything near Great Ocean Road...

I am wondering at your family's response?

You guys sit down and explain/discuss all this, go over and have a good look around the new place you might be interested in purchasing, go do it as a family, family decision.

Sounds like a place you guys can run a few chooks, maybe a pony, couple of sheep, turkeys (think what you will save at xmas?), grow a little vegie patch, some fruit trees...you can see I am biased on this.....

I and my sister were shifted around over 12 times as children, I coped fine and loved exploring, being in new places, new people, my sister it affected differently, so everyone is different, you guys as a family can work this all out. Hope it goes fine. For all of you.

 

[RumpledElf]

We moved when the offspring was about 8. She changed schools and only got to see her old bestie on the odd weekend for sleepovers (still does, but they are planning to move to Gawler soon).

She aquired a bunch of new friends (and boyfriends) very quickly. Then last term a shy new girl moved here from Adelaide, whom The Child seems to have 100% adopted, which is apparently unusual for the new girl.

Now I get complaints that our house is booooooooooooooring because we don't have a lawn/pool/trampoline/xbox/ds/wii. She doesn't want to move house again, we keep telling her that the new one will have extra rooms and more toilets and maybe even a lawn and it will only be 10 metres (not minutes, metres) away so she can still see all her friends but we still get complaints

 

[random]

Sounds fantastic Random, but I am biased, biased for wider open spaces, anything near Great Ocean Road...

I am wondering at your family's response?

You guys sit down and explain/discuss all this, go over and have a good look around the new place you might be interested in purchasing, go do it as a family, family decision.

Sounds like a place you guys can run a few chooks, maybe a pony, couple of sheep, turkeys (think what you will save at xmas?), grow a little vegie patch, some fruit trees...you can see I am biased on this.....

I and my sister were shifted around over 12 times as children, I coped fine and loved exploring, being in new places, new people, my sister it affected differently, so everyone is different, you guys as a family can work this all out. Hope it goes fine. For all of you.

Thanks OO.
Aaah , this one is about 20 mins off the Great Ocean
Yeah we went over last week , daughter loved it. We explained that it might be a bit harder to keep in touch with her mates , she didn't give a toss , still wanted it. She reckons they'd all love staying over , we can't make em go home now so maybe this new one would be even better .But we all loved it. We did a test run the other day from the school and smaller town where my wife works , 23 mins . Pretty nice drive too.
My wife gets payed by the kl so that's all payed travel , in that way the further the better.
Unfortunately the family chats have been going on for yrs and through about ten properties so far , we're all fed up with it but what can you do , gotta soldier on , or sit back and take your chances of something falling out of the sky , nearly 3 yrs though it doesn't seem too likely .
Yeah your not wrong about the space , see we had all that with our last place and love the life , space . That's why we just have not been able to take to the town block idea- we've tried , just can't go back .

This new ones gorgeous , 10 ac , 6 of bush , a creek , 15mins out from the main town. Plenty of room for a separate renter down the back in the bush, we wouldn't even know it was there, separate drive. That would damn near pay off the place for us so that's a bonus.

 

[random]

I wanted to move when the youngest 2 were in high school. One child didn't mind, but it really bothered the older one.We delayed it for about 18 months.
His friends lived close by, even though he didn't need to change schools.
I do not regret the decision.

Thanks Kath.
Funny , when I was kid I just 'WANTED ' my family to move . But even though we had plenty of money , w/end hobby farms the lot , mum and dad also looked at 20 or 30 houses over the years , we never did . We all hated it there and as we all grew up we took off . No one lives anywhere near that area now as adults.
Anyway , yeah she'd have the same school and friends but we'd be much more out of the local realm . It's been pretty quiet here for her with all that but this would be moreso . As I was saying though , she didn't care , dunno how much you put in that at that age. Maybe at boy crazy 14 she will.

Though there are a couple of dozen houses within say a mile or so radious , all lifestyle places and bushed in so it's a bit hard tpo tell who's around.
Thnking of knocking on a few doors , not crazy about doing it but it might be an idea.It'd just be nice if there were at least some other kids around .

 

[random]

But hey , check this out.

There is one other one , it's perfect in every way, dream location , setting and , it's smack in the middle of our old area and everyone we and my daughter know , even a great price.

One catch , through the trees , 25mtrs over , is a cemetery.
My wife reckons hey how bad could it be , so we might have a bit of company maybe at nights while we're out on the deck ?

Cheers

 

[mary&mat]

One catch , through the trees , 25mtrs over , is a cemetery.
My wife reckons hey how bad could it be

Cheers

I reckon they be mighty quiet neighbours you'd be gettin there

 

[kathryn d]

But hey , check this out.

There is one other one , it's perfect in every way, dream location , setting and , it's smack in the middle of our old area and everyone we and my daughter know , even a great price.

One catch , through the trees , 25mtrs over , is a cemetery.
My wife reckons hey how bad could it be , so we might have a bit of company maybe at nights while we're out on the deck ?

Cheers

I think cemetaries are great.
Rob and I often stop at them, just to say hi, and to read the headstones.
I try to make it to the ones off to the side, where many people may just overlook or not visit often.
I have no intention of every "resting" in a cemetary, but find them very fainating places.
I'd buy a property beside in a heartbeat..and especially if there was an old one on a property. How cool that would be.

 

[our obsession]

You are making me envious, acreage, near Great Ocean Road, an idea,we buy one, you buy the other, we rent to each other.

All tax deductible?

I'm not really able to shift just yet, but the idea seemed good.