Friday night, my daughter came home from work with a friend who was staying the night. She was very well spoken, polite and very friendly and we learnt that she had moved to Sydney to be with her boyfriend. During a conversation with my daughter I learned that she (the friend) had recently broken up with her boyfriend, who she was living with. She had nowhere to go and had spent the last four nights sleeping in the back seat of her car, which is still parked in front of the unit she shared with her boyfriend.
This young woman has been working and did not want to go back home to her parents (she's 22), but has no close friends or family nearby and no money to pay for a bond either. There is an aunt that does not live close enough for her to get herself to and from work since she lost her license and is reliant on public transport.
Now, I'm a bit of a soft touch, which is why I would NEVER self manage my IP's, and after getting to know her a little better yesterday, told her that she could stay at our house for a few weeks until she gets herself back on her feet. (I would like to think that somebody else would do the same for my kids if they ever got themselves into hot water) I told her about Freecycle (a service where people give their unwanted goods away) and when I logged on noticed a bed closeby that was available. I asked her if she wanted it and said that if she did, I'd collect it for her together with a coffee table from the same person.
So, at around 4.30pm, we load both the girls into the car, attach the trailer, drop the girls at work, drive out to pick up the bed. While there, the lovely woman who is giving away the bed tells us that she has a whole lot of other stuff that is available too, and did we want it for our new house guest. Well, we collect that as well, come home, set up the bed, because we didn't have a spare for her to use, and clean up the spare room. We finished this at around 8.30pm and collapse on the lounge to watch a DVD and feeling a little happy to be doing something for someone in need.
A short time later we get a call from our daughter telling us it is time to pick her up and Hubby asks if the friend has finished too. We discover that the friend is not coming back to our house tonight as she is going to her Aunt's home. I am a little annoyed that the friend did not tell us this herself, especially as we went to so much effort.
I get a text message from the friend today at around 2.30pm telling me that she will be staying with her Aunt until Tuesday and thanking me for my hospitality, but I still don't know what is happening. The message said that she would keep in contact but she still has not told me what her intentions are. Is she coming here on Tuesday? If so, it would have been polite to tell me the night before. Am I being taken advantage of? Should I tell her the deal is off? Am I justified in feeling a little used as I was under the impression she had nowhere to go? She also knew that we were going out of our way to get her the bed and coffee table.
I am usually pretty good at judging a person's character, but I don't know what to think in this situation. If she has got somewhere else to go, then she should go there.
It also seems like I now have a bed (I guess that will come in handy), a coffee table (that I don't want) and several boxes of kitchen "stuff" that I don't need either, but would be a good help to someone starting out. The "stuff" is also useless to our other daughter as she has a huge amount of goods waiting for the day she moves.
This young woman has been working and did not want to go back home to her parents (she's 22), but has no close friends or family nearby and no money to pay for a bond either. There is an aunt that does not live close enough for her to get herself to and from work since she lost her license and is reliant on public transport.
Now, I'm a bit of a soft touch, which is why I would NEVER self manage my IP's, and after getting to know her a little better yesterday, told her that she could stay at our house for a few weeks until she gets herself back on her feet. (I would like to think that somebody else would do the same for my kids if they ever got themselves into hot water) I told her about Freecycle (a service where people give their unwanted goods away) and when I logged on noticed a bed closeby that was available. I asked her if she wanted it and said that if she did, I'd collect it for her together with a coffee table from the same person.
So, at around 4.30pm, we load both the girls into the car, attach the trailer, drop the girls at work, drive out to pick up the bed. While there, the lovely woman who is giving away the bed tells us that she has a whole lot of other stuff that is available too, and did we want it for our new house guest. Well, we collect that as well, come home, set up the bed, because we didn't have a spare for her to use, and clean up the spare room. We finished this at around 8.30pm and collapse on the lounge to watch a DVD and feeling a little happy to be doing something for someone in need.
A short time later we get a call from our daughter telling us it is time to pick her up and Hubby asks if the friend has finished too. We discover that the friend is not coming back to our house tonight as she is going to her Aunt's home. I am a little annoyed that the friend did not tell us this herself, especially as we went to so much effort.
I get a text message from the friend today at around 2.30pm telling me that she will be staying with her Aunt until Tuesday and thanking me for my hospitality, but I still don't know what is happening. The message said that she would keep in contact but she still has not told me what her intentions are. Is she coming here on Tuesday? If so, it would have been polite to tell me the night before. Am I being taken advantage of? Should I tell her the deal is off? Am I justified in feeling a little used as I was under the impression she had nowhere to go? She also knew that we were going out of our way to get her the bed and coffee table.
I am usually pretty good at judging a person's character, but I don't know what to think in this situation. If she has got somewhere else to go, then she should go there.
It also seems like I now have a bed (I guess that will come in handy), a coffee table (that I don't want) and several boxes of kitchen "stuff" that I don't need either, but would be a good help to someone starting out. The "stuff" is also useless to our other daughter as she has a huge amount of goods waiting for the day she moves.