Question about my 11yo daughter

I would be wondering where he picked up the idea / behaviour of walking into someone's room in the middle of the night. That just screams 'creepy'. It isn't 'normal'. Kids at that age ARE sexually curious or even sexually involved in some cases; but they don't just randomly go into other peoples rooms in the middle of the night like that as a 'normal' behaviour. With 1 in 4 children sexually abused, it does leave a bug question mark over this child's head.

I would probably be limiting his stays from now on, and IF you did decide to let him sleep over again - I would be laying down some clear groundrules (ie, bedtime, and NO going into other kids bedrooms, etc). But truthfully, I think the protection of your own children is paramount here and would simply not allow him to sleepover again: let your son bring a different friend around instead.
 
Time to hit a bit of reality Gordo, 13 is not young at all

Cute is a lot of things, one thing it isn't is having your daughter awoken to a boy 2 years older than your 11 year old daughter at some time in the middle of the night. Like others have said your relationship with your daughter is key and you want to instill confidence that they will always come to you in any situation. Explain to her that you will be addressing this with the boy's parents as soon as possible.

Jezza
 
thanks for the followup - was wondering how it panned out. let us know how you go.

this parenting gig is hard.

my husbands uncle had motor neurone disease, which we never hid from 7yr old junior, answered all her questions over the two years, took her to the hospital for visit in the last two weeks, and he died this morning ... and ... hubby's mother (juniors nan) had a massive stroke on the weekend. she hasn't been to see nan yet as it is very traumatic to see (perhaps tomorrow but i've been able to farm her out to friends the last two days). i did explain in detail what had happend, that nan might get better or she might die.

junior was more upset that our holiday to seaworld was cancelled! :eek:

i dont' think we do kids any favours by protecting them from what really goes on - and by being open and honest, one hopes that it is reciprocate when needed.
 
Mmmm! i would bring it up with the boys perants in a casual type of buy the way the other night this happaned , and leave it at that.
and your daughter , needs to have the birds and bees talk and know that her mum and dad are her protection if she feels un comfortable.
 
Lizzie, how awful.

Motor neurone is a dreadful disease, a neighbour died of it years ago.

I hope hubby's mother recovers well.

And tell Junior your holiday is NOT cancelled, just postponed.
Marg
 
a 13 yr old knows way more than i did at that age years ago..

half the kids at 13 now are already having sex or experimenting anyway.

hate to say it but your daughter probably knows more than you do about sex.

tough call these days but the best thing to do is make your own mind up that works best for your own family...everyone is different...
 
Correct Jaycee.

Its the weirdo way he did it. Going into a girls bedroom at a funny time of night and she's two years younger. NQR

Lizzie, it sure is hard work. Sounds like you've got a well-rounded junior though if they are still concerned about Sea World! Thats just how a kid should be, really.
I hope things don't pile up too much and if Nan pulls through that she has quality of life. There might be some hard decisions to make. Don't forget to take care of hubby (and yourself) as it can very draining. My husband lost his Dad to stroke a few years ago.
 
thanks guys - and sorry to pinch gordon's thread.

yes - seaworld in merely postponed and she's happier now that we'll take her out of school to go in another month or so.

with hubby away, and all other family living away (except the now-widow of the uncle) i've had to stay with my father in law thru it all ... junior has been great and no hassle. fortunately the family are all descending tomorrow night.

doc's don't think she'll recover enough to go home, assuming she gets out of hospital in to care at all. it's a bit of fingers and toes crossed - but for which result at 77? better or crash?
 
Lizzie - all the best.

Hi Guys,

As I think I mentioned, the boy apoligised to us and to my daughter.

My daughter has not slept in her bedroom since "that night"

Now, you need to know my daughter, she is an actress and she plays on things but in this case, I am worried.

Now, I am going to our trusted GP next week for a checkup, I will bring it up with her.
As I mentioned, I am worried about what damage it might have done.

GG
 
Reading this thread made me anxious in the stomach with the whole story, I'm afraid. :( I don't want to be alarmist but for an 11 year old to not sleep in her own room just because some creepy boy said he loved her rings a few alarm bells with me too. I'm really glad you intervened, GG and hopefully it is all OK.
 
I can't give parenting advice but this is made so much worse by the fact that he has 18 and 19 yr old brothers. As a 17 yo now, I KNOW what sort of things this boy may have been exposed to just by his brothers. So the boy is a victim himself to an extent. Keep that in mind.
 
A victim of what, older brothers? Boo hoo. As soon as the brain develops the capability of understanding actions and consequences, they are accountable.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.

Similar threads

W
TheDangers of crystal meth ..
Replies
8
Views
1K
LoneWolf
LoneWolf
redwing
Grandparents Looking After Grandchildren
2 3
Replies
47
Views
7K
skater
skater
H
Our Night Of Terror
3 4 5
Replies
81
Views
9K
Harro
H
see_change
?What Crisis??: How to buy a Sydney apartment on a $29,000 salary
Replies
18
Views
4K
see_change
see_change
W
When to make the decision to say goodbye to a family pet?
2
Replies
33
Views
3K
our obsession
our obsession
Back
Top